Must….not….foam….at….mouth….

John Scalzi thinks that George Lucas is the weak link in the Star Wars chain.

Consider my lip “bitten”.

(Although, aside from Greedo shooting first and a couple of instances of new footage upsetting the pacing toward the end of The Empire Strikes Back, just what is so damned awful about those Special Editions? I rather liked how they turned out, overall. The people who bitch that the new dance number in Return of the Jedi sucks really floor me — it’s supposed to be campy and dumb! What did they expect, Astaire and Rogers? OK, I’ll stop now.)

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Maybe he was on a secret mission for Henry Kissinger?

Kevin Drum’s been doggedly following the documentary evidence, such as it is, surrounding the questions about George W. Bush’s service in the National Guard. At the end of today’s post, Kevin asks:

“Bottom line: if Bush’s story is really true, he can put a stop to all this speculation instantly by simply ordering all the relevant archives to release his entire record, warts and all. Why won’t he?”

That’s a good question, considering that releasing service records in their entirety used to be par-for-the-course for Presidents (except in the case of Clinton, who never served), up until this particular President. My suspicion is that the answer to Kevin’s question is twofold: First, there really is something embarrassing in Bush’s service record, although almost certainly nothing that rises to the level of, say, Michael Moore’s insistence that Bush is a “deserter” (why General Clark didn’t distance himself from that is beyond me). There probably is a bit of self-preservation going on here; likely, Bush’s service was spotty enough to warrant some kind of “slap-on-the-wrist” discipline, and they don’t want that getting out.

Second, though, I suspect that the Bush people don’t want to release the records because to do so would be to turn from their constant attitude to date of, “We are the Executive Branch, you will listen to us, you will take whatever we decide to give you, and you will like it.” The idea that anyone should have any question about anything pertaining to the President beyond what has already been doled out piecemeal is completely alien to their mindset.

(To be fair, this is not a failing unique to the Bush Administration, although I think they elevate it to amazing levels, what with their tendency to bleat “But it’s wartime!” at every instance of potential criticism and request for information. The Clinton Administration’s reluctance to just fork everything over at the outset of the whole Whitewater mess kept that whole embarrassment simmering along, right up to the arrival on the scene of “that woman, Miss Lewinsky”.)

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The Writer’s Ideal Day Job

I’ve seen this topic come up a few times in various writing-related message boards: what is the ideal day job for an aspiring writer or a writer who isn’t up to subsistence levels of writing income yet? I’m sure that there’s no absolutely ideal such job, since everybody’s different and yada yada yada, but here’s what I’ve discovered.

:: Any job that involves long periods in front of a computer screen is lousy for a writer, because it’s really hard to spend seven or eight hours at a desk and then come home, sit down at a different desk, and keep right on doing computer stuff. My last job was in telesales, and the first few months there killed my writing output. Luckily, the solution there was obvious, for me: I wrote longhand at home, because the atmosphere was totally different. Plus, working longhand is the only way to be “portable” for a writer who doesn’t have a laptop, and I really enjoyed packing it all up in my canvas Land’s End book bag and taking it to Borders or wherever. The big downside there was that writing longhand is slower than typing, but I often found that all to the good, since I can often type faster than I can think. (The results thereof tend to show up here, of all places!)

:: A non-computer job, then, is good. But another consideration isn’t just the “in front of a computer for hours” syndrome. There’s the little matter of mental energy. A job that doesn’t involve a whole lot of deep thought is good for writing, because then one can do a lot of “mental story processing” while working at something else. I’m finding myself doing this a lot at the store: let’s be honest, wandering around with a broom and dust butler isn’t the most mentally stimulating of tasks, but I get to do a lot of thinking about the current story or chapter in the novel, which is great. If you wish to be a writer, an essential skill to cultivate is the ability to think in a “writerly” way even when not actually sitting down just a-stringin’ words along. In the current job, I have been finding myself thinking about my characters and what they’re doing, even as I’m attending to the demands of the job at hand. I couldn’t do this in telesales, because you just can’t mull over an upcoming conversation between two characters while you’re trying to con entice the pharmacist on the other end of the line to buy twice as much Phenytoin Oral Suspension as he says he needs.

Ah, but! You don’t want too much consumption of mental resources on the job, else you won’t be able to think about writing; but it can go the other way, as well. A job that requires one to do the same repetitive task, over and over and over again, for hours without change in tasks, is just as mentally draining and consumptive of resources as the sales job. This I discovered when working in the university library years ago; back then it usually fell to me to sort together the shipments of new cards for the card catalog, which came in thousands at a time. The effect of this was numbing. So, too, was the time in the telesales job when they had me do nothing but conduct “customer service” surveys, in which I made calls with no sales component. Again, the repetition killed my ability to divert mental energy to thinking about writing at the same time I was simply reading the same questions over and over again. So here you need a job that moves you from one duty to the next.

:: Restaurant management, I always found, had moments when I could think about writing and moments when I couldn’t, and the higher on the management chain of command I ascended, the fewer the “writing-able” moments were. The implication here is pretty obvious: avoid too much responsibility, because it kills the ability to think about story.

:: I’ve never held any kind of editorial position, so I’m not prepared to advance any claims as to how spending hours upon hours reading dreadful story after dreadful story from the slushpile affects one’s writerly acumen. I have my suspicions, though.

So what’s the point of all this? Simply to say that I’m optimistic about my current job not killing my writing — especially once I’m again used to, you know, punching a clock and actually doing something.

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I hope she steered well clear of the really tall canned goods displays….

Observed today at the store: a woman doing her shopping, and as she did so, she ticked off the items on her shopping list — which was displayed on the top window of the screen of the laptop computer she had balanced atop the child seat. Wow. Some people really fetishize this whole “paperless life” thing, eh?

(My first thought was that she was some kind of vendor or management person doing something related to pricing or inventory, but no dice — I saw her in the checkout lane, and again a minute later while I was sweeping outside.)

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A WHAT for every student?!

Kevin Drum reports that his local middle school is supplying all students with PDAs. They’re using mini-keyboards to type in their crappy essays and “beam” them to the teacher, who is just agog at how easy everything is. And I’m sure the teacher is paying close attention to spelling, and not merely running each student’s work through the spellchecker. You know, so she can catch things like “too” when the kid means “to”. Right. I’m enormously sympathetic to teachers and the work they have to do and the basic lack of respect they get for doing it, but all the same I’m not sure that we should really do things like this on the basis that it makes their lives easier.

Look. I’m a firm believer that we should be spending tons of money on our schools, that there should be one teacher for every ten kids, and that a teacher should make a lot of money. (I also wouldn’t mind seeing the teachers’ unions put up so many roadblocks to getting rid of bad teachers, but that’s another issue.) But this “Give the latest tech toy to every kid” thing just drives me crazy, and not just because it pisses me off that kids are being given laptops when I might be able to afford a laptop sometime in 2006, if I play my cards right and sell a novel or two. Mainly it’s because I envision all the little tykes with their spiffy iMacs or Vaios or whatevers, and then I immediately envision the way my seventh-grade math textbook, which had been brand new when given to me, looked when I handed it back in nine months later. And I was far from the worst student when it came to keeping my books from being dropped on the floor out of clumsiness or deposited there by virtue of my running into my school’s version of Nelson Muntz.

Kevin also points out the tech support problems: are schools that give out freebie tech toys going to employ a full-time tech dude to change batteries and fix broken screens and repair keyboards and whatnot?

And finally, how many art and music programs could be funded for the cost of a PalmPilot for every pupil?

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I am not locked in here with you; YOU are locked in here with ME.

Everything you ever wanted to know about the Rorschach Test, including the actual inkblots. I confess that my first thought is to print them out, blow them up, and give them to my daughter as coloring pages. Is this test still administered? My skepticism is captured by this statement from the site:

“Many psychologists think the Rorschach test is hopelessly unreliable; others see it as one of the cardinal tools of modern psychodiagnosis. Even among those who acknowledge the value of the test, there is disagreement on interpretation of responses.”

In other words: “Lots of shrinks believe this is total bullshit, and the ones that don’t think it’s total bullshit don’t agree on what it means.” OK, then….sounds like a couple of the undergrad philosophy conferences I attended while in college, but without the possibility of being chucked in the sanitarium.

(via Scott of Archipelapogo, who’s sporting a ton of nifty linkage lately.)

(And a cyber-gumdrop for anyone who gets the reference in the title!)

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On this date….

…in 1587, Mary Queen of Scots was beheaded.

…in 1725, emperor Peter the Great of Russia died.

…in 1915, the film Birth of a Nation opened.

And, most importantly, in 1932: composer John Williams, the film composer to whose music I return most often, was born. Happy 72nd, Maestro Williams, and stay healthy — Episode III is still in the offing!

(Historical events courtesy This Day In History by the History Channel.)

UPDATE: In Maestro Williams’s honor, I am now listening to the score to The Empire Strikes Back, and as always happens when I listen to this music, I’m sitting here bobbing my head like a goof and thinking, “Best F***ing score ever!” We now end this moment of extreme geekery.

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