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Before my wife and I were married, we underwent the obligatory meetings with the Pastor who would perform our ceremony to discuss our wishes for the wedding, as well as other issues. When it came to the issue of music, we worked with the church’s music director, a fine organist and musician who had a wealth of suggestions to make as to what to use for the Processional, the hymns, the Postlude, and so on. The only rule we were asked to observe, with respect to music, was that we could only select music that was religiously themed — i.e., no pop tunes. We were only too happy to observe this stipulation; it never occurred to us to use some popular song for our wedding. However, this is not the case for everyone; at a wedding we attended two years later, “My Heart Will Go On” was given a central position smack dab in the middle of the ceremony.

Well, it’s not just weddings that are being popularized these days. According to this NPR story, in the United Kingdom popular music is turning up more and more at funerals. Wow. There is even a Top Ten of songs used most often at funerals. I won’t reprint the Top Ten here — it can be read at the link above — but I will say that it’s an interesting list. (And that “My Heart Will Go On” is on it.)

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As usual, there are few things more conducive to starting conversations and debate than making a list of “The {number} Best {things}”. (Or “Worst”, as the case may be.) That said, ESPN has named the Top Twenty Sports Films of All Time. I haven’t seen all of these, but the ones that I have are quite deserving of their accolades here. I would, though, include Tin Cup, but maybe that’s because I’m not a golfer. I have yet to find an avid golfer who actually likes that movie. And personally, I would omit Eight Men Out in favor of Major League. And since I’m including Major League, I’d ditch The Bad News Bears in favor of The Karate Kid. You can’t help but love a movie that added “Wax on, wax off” to the national lexicon.

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These days it’s pretty hard to keep straight all of the comic-book adaptation film projects that are either filming, casting, being written, being talked about, especially if you’re not quite up-to-speed on who all the superheroes are in the first place. (When I heard that a Fantastic Four movie was in the works, I wondered if it was the version with She-Hulk in place of The Thing; and will the cinematic X-Men be the revolving door group that the comic version is?) Anyway, here is a site that explains it all.

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Kevin J. Anderson is a pretty hot property in science-fiction these days, almost exclusively on the basis of his media tie-in novels and his novels set in other authors’ universes. He has written a number of Star Wars novels, several X-Files novels, and also books set in Frank Herbert’s Dune mythos. Anderson has done a lot of playing in other people’s playgrounds, although to my eyes not always successfully. His Star Wars books, most notably his Jedi Academy trilogy, are partially successful — they capture the “flavor” of Star Wars fairly well, but his villains are not particularly menacing. (As a friend of mine put it, “Every time Admiral Daala appears she is either scheming or getting another one of her Star Destroyers blown up.”) I thought the Jedi Academy trilogy suffered from overplotting; the trilogy was filled with events that really had no bearing on the main story, and so the whole thing really could have been reduced to a duology or perhaps a single novel. His other fault was his tendency to throw in cute allusions to the movies that were really somewhat distracting. (Just because George Lucas sticks a THX-1138 reference into all of his movies doesn’t mean that the novels have to include them as well.) On the basis of Anderson’s Star Wars books, of which I was mainly ambivalent, I’ve avoided his other tie-in work. But now he’s got his very own backyard to play in, with Hidden Empire: The Saga of Seven Suns, Book One.

According to Anderson’s website, there are to be four books total when the series is complete. Thus, Hidden Empire is what one might expect: a set-up novel, in which the setting is established, the characters introduced, and the conflicts begun. Set five hundred years in the future, humans are colonizing the universe and coming into conflict with both themselves and an alien force called the Ildiran Empire. In typical fashion, the arrogant humans manage to set in motion events that have terrifying consequences as a war with a previously-unknown alien species erupts.

I enjoyed Hidden Empire, and I definitely plan to read the next volume if not the entire rest of the series. Anderson has a lot of interesting ideas here, and I want to see how they play out. Just about every trope of grand space opera is here: alien empires, both past and present; ancient artifacts of staggering power and unexpected results; mystical priests; space merchants and their travails with space pirates; the conflict of societies high and low; giant fleets of starfaring warships; high government conspiracies; antagonisms that must be buried in the face of grander conflict; unknown antagonisms that arise at the worst possible time; star-crossed romance; et cetera. Reading this stuff, you can imagine the sights appearing on a giant movie screen with a suitably-bombastic score — by John Williams or Jerry Goldsmith, of course — highlighting the action. There are things here that I would love to see. I’d love to see the Skymines, floating through the upper atmospheres of the gas giant planets. I’d love to see the Ildiran home planet, with its seven suns. I’d love to see the diamond-hulled warships of the Hydrogues. I’d love to see the ancient Klikiss ruins, and the robots they left behind when they mysteriously disappeared. Anderson has a gift for evoking visuals in his prose, which was always a strength of his Star Wars work.

There are, though, a number of problems with the book. Some of them are problems of the “Book One” variety. Mainly, Hidden Empire is a set-up novel, so in reality not a whole lot happens in the first 120 pages; we simply look on as Anderson introduces us to character after character, gives us lengthy history lessons, shows us his technology, and establishes the conflicts that will play out later on. And even when things start to happen (roughly around page 120), it still takes to book a long time to build up momentum. In fact, the book doesn’t so much “build” as it suddenly kicks into high gear (around page 300 or so), and the last fifty pages are especially frenetic as Anderson goes about the business of leaving his characters, one by one, in a precarious spot to be resolved in Book Two. The pacing is wildly uneven, and I remember that being a prime fault of his Star Wars work as well. Perhaps if he had used fewer characters at the outset, and only introduced more once the pot was nicely boiling, the pacing would work better.

Anderson’s model in writing Saga of the Seven Suns is obvious: George R. R. Martin’s titanic fantasy epic A Song of Ice and Fire. That series also features a cast of thousands operating in a war-torn world, and Martin’s books are even longer than Anderson’s. (The most recent volume of Martin’s series, A Storm of Swords, comes in at over 900 pages, in hardback, and that’s not including the Appendices.) Anderson borrows Martin’s device of telling each chapter from the viewpoint of a different character, so through the novel our viewpoint is constantly changing. Thus, there is no “Luke Skywalker” or “Frodo Baggins” in Hidden Empire; there is no single protagonist, but a series of characters — some likable, some not — who have their own parts to play. In Anderson’s hands, though, the device gets confusing because he uses too many viewpoint characters at once, from all over his world; Martin, on the other hand, starts with a small number of viewpoint characters and only adds more once he is sure we know who is who with respect to the characters we’ve already met. With Martin, while we need to refer to his Appendices to identify the supporting players, we don’t forget who Ned Stark or Tyrion Lannister are. With Anderson, though, I had to constantly flip to the back of the book to remind myself who Nira or Rememberer Di’osh were. This is distracting, to say the least. The other key bit of genius in Martin’s application of this viewpoint device is that we are never sure of who the villains are; everything is ambiguous. We think we are rooting for the Starks — except that Tyrion Lannister is a sympathetic character, and some of the Starks just aren’t likable. (And there is one character whom Martin grooms us to hate, only to have us sympathizing with him in the third book.) Anderson can’t match Martin’s subtlety of character; and so the wonderful sense of ambiguity that keeps Martin’s work fresh is absent in Anderson’s.

The other problem I have with Anderson, as I noted above, is his cute allusions. He specifically alludes to Martin’s work, borrowing a couple of Martin’s names for minor characters in his own work (Bronn and Stannis, to be precise). In Martin, to join the Men of the Night’s Watch is called “taking the black”, so in Anderson we have the joining of the Green Priesthood “taking the green”. The most irritating allusion was the name of the space pirate, Sorengaard. Of course, if I hadn’t been a philosophy major, I’d likely not have noticed the contraction of Soren Kierkegaard’s name; but I was, and I noticed. Little things like that seem minor, and I suppose they are, but they do have the effect of disgorging a reader who notices them. It’s the literary equivalent of going to see a movie and spotting the mike boom, only here it’s not the fault of the projectionist but actually the filmmaker. (And now there’s a contest for someone to actually get their name into next book. Sheesh!)

And finally, not really a complaint, but an observation: I hope the cover artist for Hidden Empire pays a royalty or something to Doug Chiang at Lucasfilm, because that cover painting is strikingly similar to the early designs for the underwater Gungan City in The Phantom Menace.

Hidden Empire is not a bad book, by any means. It does what every Book One is supposed to do: it’s got me planning to read Book Two. But it really could have been a lot better than it is.

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A trio of interesting articles from Slate today:

:: A commentary on the stodginess of the recent Sight & Sound polls of the ten greatest films of all time that considers the question of why the most recent film on the list was released in 1974, and why the disparity between the critics and the directors who responded to the poll.

:: What is the worst sports stadium in the US? A couple of years ago it would have been Three Rivers Stadium in Pittsburgh, which was passable for football but an ugly monstrosity of a baseball park. Well, now that Three Rivers is history, Slate surprisingly turns to tennis for its choice as worst stadium.

:: Is President Bush’s newly-unveiled forestry plan a bit of environmental idiocy that sells out our forests in favor of votes in Western states where logging is still an industry? or is it actually a wise new response to years of poor forest management that has led to the destruction of immense amounts of forest and property? According to Slate, it’s both.

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IMAGE OF THE WEEK





Ginger Rogers and Fred Astaire in Top Hat (1935).

:: I’ve loved musicals nearly all of my life, and some of the most wonderful are the ones made for RKO Studios starring the legendary dance duo Fred Astaire and Ginger Rogers. Fans of these films tend to be divided on which Astaire-Rogers film was the best, but the two that will usually be named are either Top Hat or Swing Time (1936). My personal favorite is Top Hat, probably because I saw it first. It’s a beautiful entertainment, full of music and romance. Its frothy story hinges on mistaken identity, that device which drives so many comedies, but rarely is it handled with as much aplomb as in Top Hat. And the dancing? Well, it’s Fred Astaire and Ginger Rogers. Nothing more need be said than that. In this day and age of young women scantilly clad and gyrating in an effort that is theoretically supposed to suggest eroticism, what Astaire and Rogers accomplished was actual romance — an idealization of love that is at once breathtaking and life-affirming. Britney Spears can thrash about in all the Pepsi commercials she wants, but she will likely never approach the level of artistry that Astaire and Rogers achieve in all of their numbers, some of which are truly sublime.

Heaven, I’m in Heaven, and my heart beats so that I can hardly speak….

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I am now participating in a group-blog called Collaboratory, which was conceived by Sean Meade, the owner of Interact. This project is in its infancy, and we’re not even totally certain of our “mission” (if there even is one), but here’s hoping. Check it out. (As of this writing there are only a handful of posts and no front-page bells or whistles, though I’m sure those are to come.)

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I’ve added a section to the sidebar at left, called Notable Dispatches. Here I shall provide front-page links to past entries that I particularly like. Nominations are, of course, accepted.

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It’s interesting how the same idea will crop up in multiple places in creative circles, and roughly within the same timeframe. Consider 1993, when two films about Wyatt Earp came out, or a few years later when legendary distance runner Steve Prefontaine was the subject of not one but two biopics. I wrote last week about the television series Millennium, which involved a former FBI agent named Frank Black who used an almost-psychic gift to track down serial killers; the same year that Millennium debuted on FOX, another series showed up on NBC that was about an FBI agent named Samantha Waters who used an almost-psychic gift to track down serial killers. This show was Profiler, which lasted four seasons to Millennium‘s three.

All of these examples jumped to mind when I read this MSN article about a recent spate of novels centering on, of all things, the Jewish golem. I read one of these novels recently — Michael Chabon’s The Amazing Adventures of Kavalier & Klay, which I reviewed here — and I am a bit surprised that the golem is suddenly such a popular item. (It was also the subject of an episode of The X-Files during that show’s fourth season.)

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Which brings us to the Bills uniform revision. When Tuesday Morning Quarterback saw the design he had a simple, primal reaction: to run from the room screaming, “aaaiiiiiiiiyyyyyyyyeeeeeeeeeeee!”

The new Buffalo garb looks so much like current New England attire that when the Bills play the Pats, Drew Bledsoe isn’t going to know which huddle to join. And the Bills have tossed out red as their accent color, replacing it with gray. Gray — now there’s a color that really pops. And the away jerseys are so fussy, they make Denver’s rollerball duds seem a clean design. But these are not the reasons for TMQ’s primal scream. The reason is that Buffalo had been using traditional American flag red-white-and-blue, and now abandons that combination. In other words, the Buffalo Bills thought they could improve on red, white and blue.

— Gregg Easterbrook, Tuesday Morning Quarterback, on the Bills’ new uniforms.

:: I have to say, I agree with TMQ on this one. I was fairly ambivalent about the Bills’ new duds when they were unveiled (well, actually I was ambivalent about the home uniform while I immediately disliked the new road uniform), but now that I’ve seen more of it….I don’t like the look. The Bills don’t look distinctive anymore; instead, they look like every other team that has hopped on the New Uniform Bandwagon in recent years. (The Bills’ new look is inspired by the Broncos and the Titans, apparently.)

Easterbrook’s AFC preview is up, with the NFC to come next week. If you haven’t read Easterbrook before, please do so. He is funny, engaging and literate. He also knows a hell of a lot about football.

(BTW, it seems that my middle-of-the-road view regarding the Doug Flutie vs. Rob Johnson fiasco was the correct one. While Bills fans were either jumping on the Johnson bandwagon or burning their Bills gear after the team had the audacity to send Flutie on his way, I was saying: “They both stink”. Guess what? Neither Johnson nor Flutie is starting this year.)

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