Unidentified Earth 48 (The Return!)

And now another formerly regular feature here at Byzantium’s Shores makes its triumphant return! I don’t think I ever bothered to officially reveal the location of UI 47, almost four months ago, but as I recall, it was guessed correctly very quickly as the bleachers in straightaway center field at Wrigley Field, in Chicago. Seeing as how the seats are completely empty, I can only assume that shot was taken in October, since the Cubs so rarely need to open up the stadium in October! [rimshot]

Anyway, it’s been a few months, so I’m going to simply reset all Quatloo values to zero. For all of you who failed to claim your Quatloos after guessing correctly, well, them’s the breaks. Hey, it’s not my fault that only the Bank of Aldebaran IV exchanges Quatloos for American dollars. If you can’t get to Aldebaran, that’s your problem. But enough of that, time for the new puzzler:

Where are we? Rot-13 your guesses!

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Oooooh! A quiz!

Belladonna has a quiz, one of those ones that started in e-mail but can be ported to blogging easily. It has two parts. First a “Things you’ve done” list, then some questions. Here it is, with the things I’ve done in bold:

Gone on a blind date. (Never. I am staggeringly awful at situations where I am forced to meet new people. To me, the worst form of torture is those horrible business “meetings” where people from various locations are gathered in one place and then shuffled around so you’re spending the day with people you’ve never met. I hate that stuff and I tend to clam up, so I have to think I’d be one of the world’s worst blind dates. But hey, at least I’d be unlikely to make a pass at the woman…but then, it’s not like this is ever going to happen anyway, so why am I going on about it? Moving on.)

Skipped school. (Never an actual entire day of school, but I did skip classes more than once.

Watched someone die (If a cat counts as “someone”, which I think it does.)

Been to Canada (Fun place; we need to go back. It’s been two years since our last foray, although I still carry psychological scars from the ordeal of trying to get back into the US.)

Been to Mexico (I have no memory of it, but my mother says I’ve been there.)

Been to Florida (Last time was Disney World in 1998. Loved it.)

Been to Africa

Been on a plane (I don’t much like flying, but I’ll do it if I have to. I’d rather take a train, if we had better trains in this country.)

Been lost (I’ve also been in Nebraska. Same thing. [rimshot])

Gone to Washington, DC (Wow, I’ve never been there! What’s wrong with that picture?)

Swam in the ocean (The Pacific and the Atlantic.)

Broken a bone

Been in a traffic accident.

Cried yourself to sleep

Been on TV

Stold traffic signs (Yeah, that’s how they spelled it, folks. “Stold”. I’ll be charitable and assume that they hit the ‘d’ when they were aiming for the ‘e’. It happens. You should see the typos I generate in rough drafts.)

Played cops and robbers (Maybe not “Cops and Robbers” specifically, but as kids we did have our own versions of “Good guys, Bad guys” games.)

Recently colored with crayons

Sang Karaoke

Paid for a meal with coins only (It was a fast food joint, so it was something like sixteen quarters, which they actually didn’t mind all that much. Receiving large bills is actually a much bigger pain in the ass than receiving all coins, since large bills — especially very early in the day — make it harder to make change for people afterwards. I once had a teenage jerkoff come into Pizza Hut with his equally stupid girlfriend, and this guy was trying to act all impressive by flicking his $100 bill onto the counter at me when he came up to pay. Problem was, he was the first paying customer of the day, so I didn’t have enough tens or twenties to make good change for him, so I very nicely opened the safe and counted out his change to him. I sent that jerkweed on his way with a pocket full of $88 in singles. He tried making a stink about it, but I just looked at him and said, “Sorry, this is a restaurant, not a bank. That’s all I’ve got to make your change with.” He didn’t have a choice, so he took his money and left, grumbling all the while.)

Done something you told yourself you wouldn’t (That could be the title of my autobiography, actually: Things I Did Even Though I Told Myself I Wouldn’t.)

Made prank phone calls (Not very often, just two or three times in college after a bit of drinking. No dirty talk, just calling people at 3:00 am and saying, “Are you sleeping?” And then they said “Not anymore”, saying, “OK, goodnight!”)

Laughed until some kind of beverage came out of your nose & elsewhere. (Yeah, I was “that kid” in grade school. The one the other kids would try to make laugh at lunch time for this very reason.)

Caught a snowflake on your tongue (Lucy’s full of crap, by the way. November snowflakes taste wonderful, and December snowflakes are heavenly.)

Danced in the rain (I don’t dance. I should.)

Written a letter to Santa Claus

Been kissed under the mistletoe (Another I should do.)

Watched the sunrise with someone (With employees at work, actually. I like sunrises.)

Blown bubbles (Bubbles are fun.)

Gone ice-skating (I naturally figured it would be almost exactly like rollerblading. It’s not.)

Been skinny dipping outdoors (I’ve never had the opportunity, and I’m not sure I’d do it if I did. Paranoia, you know.)

Gone to the movies (Strange quiz, isn’t this? Hasn’t everybody done this?)

Have a nickname (I need to get one. “Jaquandor” isn’t a nickname, I don’t think.)

Body piercings (Nope.)

Other Questions:

1. Favorite drink?

Alcoholic? I love the Spiced Rum (“spum”, ’round these parts), the Vanilla Rum, and the Coconut Rum. I also like the Southern Comfort; all of these, mixed with cola. I also love red wine of all types. And beer. And draft cider.

Non-alcoholic? There’s good old water. I’ve cut back on the coffee and switched to green tea several days a week; I love tea with honey, except for good mint teas which don’t need any sweetener. Chocolate milk is a great post-workout beverage. And so on.

2. How much do you love your job?

Great! I just got a new toolbag for my tools, replacing the toolbox I was using. Sweet! (Although work’s about to get crazy busy since we’re in the crazy busy time of year anyway, and we’re a few weeks out from our annual visit from the people whose name is actually on the front of the building.)

3. Birthplace?

Pittsburgh, PA.

4. Favorite vacation spot?

I just like going away and wish I could do it more…but vacations of the “stick around home and just not go to work for several days” are nice too.

5. Ever eaten just cookies for dinner?

No. PB&J, yes. Cookies, no.

6. Favorite pie?

Apple with ice cream. Pumpkin. Cherry. And I also love coconut cream and French silk pies, which are nice for their variety of uses! (But definitely not pecan! That’s only good for eating, only. Attempting otherwise can only result in blunt force trauma.)

7. Favorite holiday? Different reasons, but I love Christmas, Thanksgiving, and New Year’s Day.

8. Favorite food? Just one? Come on! If really pressed, my default, safe answer is pizza. But even that is a floating variable.

9 Favorite smell? Cooking meat. Burning leaves. Incense. Freshly cut wood. Napalm in the morning. (OK, not that last one.)

10. How do you relax? By reading, writing, listening to music, watching movies, going for walks, working out, plotting how I will destroy my foes.

11. How do you see yourself in 10 years? Probably like I am now, only maybe a bit more financially successful. I’ll be grayer, that’s for sure, but I’m fine with that.

No tags. Just a quiz.

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Sunday Burst of Weirdness

And we’re back with the Burst of Weirdness! Yay!!!

:: No Smoking in the Skull Cave has a post up called How to Hatch a Dinosaur: A Batman Episode in 18 Screen Caps. It’s funny in that kitsch way, of course, but the very first one makes me think of if this year’s Republican ticket had actually run in 1968….

:: I’ve had this bookmarked for a while, so here it is: Star Wars rubber ducks. I can’t endorse this; Darth Vader shouldn’t squeak when you squeeze him.

:: I plugged “Cthulhu” into Google’s Blog Search, and after a couple of clicks I found Cthulhu Family Circus. I’m so glad it’s Jeffy in that strip!

And we’re back. Huzzah!!!

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Scoring Her Majesty’s Secret Service

No James Bong Blog-a-Thon would be complete without a post somewhere about the music of Bond, would it? Why, no! That’s why I’m here, folks. I fill a need.

Any discussion of the music of James Bond must begin, and probably end, with John Barry. Barry is an English composer who has had a very long and storied career. Apart from his work on the Bond films, Barry has also written notable scores to films like The Lion in Winter, Born Free, Out of Africa, Body Heat, and Dances With Wolves, for which he won an Oscar. Barry is still kicking and still active as a composer, although he doesn’t much write for films anymore, and he hasn’t scored a Bond film since 1987’s The Living Daylights.

Starting with Dr. No, the series had a distinctive musical voice, grounded in the string-and-percussion heavy sound of the 1960s, with a lot of “stinger” notes from the brass punctuating things. Dr. No‘s opening sequence kicks us right into the musical sound-world of James Bond: after the gunbarrel sequence (which is actually “scored” in that film with some odd electronica), the famous James Bond Theme kicks in for the first time ever.

Now, the James Bond Theme has been a subject of controversy for many years. It is always credited in the films as having been written by a man named Monty Norman, but this has been a point of contention for a long time, and it was even the topic of a court case in Great Britain some years ago. I don’t know what was decided in that case, but my general notion is that Norman gets credit for the theme, but Barry’s been arranging it as he sees fit ever since. (Or, at least, that’s what he did on his tenure as the Bond composer-in-residence.)

Dr. No‘s score is dominated by Jamaican rhythms, and to modern ears the score at times seems to be making gestures in pretty silly fashion. The James Bond Theme, for example, plays in its full arrangement early in the film not when Bond is doing serious spy work but when he’s finishing up his game of baccarat and is on his way back to his apartment. Likewise, the score is occasionally dominated by a song called “Under the Mango Tree”, which is…well, there’s no way to sugarcoat it. It’s a silly song. I’ve always found Dr. No‘s score to be much like the rest of the film: I can see where it’s pointing the way the rest of the series will go, but it’s not terribly satisfying on its own.

Barry would return for From Russia With Love, a score that’s more confident of itself. Notable here is that the film’s song is only heard in its vocal arrangement (crooned nicely, if not spectacularly, by Matt Munro) during the end credits, while Barry writes an impressive up-tempo arrangement of it for the opening credits, featuring a series of staccato brass chords as an opening figure that’s highly distinctive. (David Arnold would use those same staccato chords many years later in a few of his own Bond scores, one of many ways he’s paid homage to Barry.) The scoring for the Orient Express sequence is some wonderfully suspenseful “travel montage” music indeed, and the score’s a lot more confident, excepting one “danger” cue that is tracked from the Dr. No score.

With Goldfinger, Barry started to hit his stride. This score is like the song: big, brassy, and without a trace of subtlety to be heard within it. This is many enthusiasts’ favorite Barry Bond score (although not mine), particularly thrilling are the cues underscoring the flight of Pussy Galore’s Flying…whatever they were called. Flying Circus? Flying Uruk-Hai? I don’t remember…but it’s great stuff. And of course, the theme song, belted out by Shirley Bassey, is the model for all Bond songs, even if it’s not my favorite.

Thunderball would bring an even bigger and brassier score, well befitting a film whose main goal was to be just plain bigger than the iconic Goldfinger. Barry’s score for Thunderball is, to my ears, even better then Goldfinger, even if it’s slightly schizophrenic at times. Barry wrote a song for the film called “Mr. Kiss Kiss Bang Bang” and, as was his wont, incorporated that song’s tune into his score all over the place, only to have the producers ask him to write a new song that used the film’s title in its lyrics…hence we hear Tom Jones belting out about a man who “strikes…like thunderball”. (What does that mean? Nobody knows!) Interestingly, if you listen to the song’s original recording, you can almost hear Tom Jones losing consciousness after that last note which he had to hold for something like a day and a half. Thunderball also features the second instance of Barry’s secondary Bond Theme, which he titled “007” (previously used in From Russia With Love in a proto-form).

Next up was You Only Live Twice, in which Barry wrote in faux-Japanese style. This was in no way authentic Japanese music, but what a British composer would write if asked to write something sounding Japanese. It’s an extremely lyrical score, much more melodic and fluid than Thunderball. The song is sung by Nancy Sinatra, and even though it boasts a beautiful melody, it’s not the most memorable of Bond songs.

This brings us to what is, for me, the best Bond score of them all, befitting the best Bond film of them all, On Her Majesty’s Secret Service. This score is brilliant from start to finish: it boasts amazing melodies, some of Barry’s best action writing, a pounding main theme (for the instrumental opening credits music), and a gorgeous cue for the helicopter flight through the Alps. Barry gives the film’s song, “We Have All the Time In the World”, a number of different arrangements, one of which is proud and almost arrogant, another of which is terribly sad and lonely, and yet another which is just ravishing. I love this score deeply; it’s one of my favorite film scores ever. “We Have All the Time In the World” is only heard in its vocal arrangement during neither opening nor closing credits, but rather about a third of the way through the film, as scoring for a love montage between Bond and Tracy.

Barry would close out the Connery era with Diamonds are Forever, in which he goes back to some of the Goldfinger sound, all the way to using the same singer for the song, Shirley Bassey. It’s not that great a score, frankly, but it has a lot of nice moments and a nice sound of “glitter” to it, befitting the diamonds of the plot. That’s actually a strength of Barry’s throughout: he’s able to always suggest various things about each individual film, be it the “gold” of Goldfinger, the undersea adventure of Thunderball, the love story of OHMSS, the diamond glitter of Diamonds are Forever.

Roger Moore’s arrival as Bond would also see Barry’s first temporary departure from the series. Live and Let Die was scored not by Barry but by George Martin, a producer for the Beatles. As much as I dislike LaLD (it’s my least favorite Bond film by a long margin), I have to give Martin his due: this is a nicely written score, not totally divorced from the John Barry sound but also bringing some new approaches to the table. Roger Moore plays Bond with more overt swagger, and the score reflects that view of the Bond character pretty well. The title song is performed by Paul McCartney and Wings, and it’s an odd song, although it’s had a longer life on oldies stations and the like. The song is hindered by a very odd middle section that is in a completely different style than the beginning and end.

John Barry would return for The Man with the Golden Gun, which is, like the rest of the movie, mainly OK. It’s not one of the better scores by any stretch, but it’s got some strengths, mostly in the film’s last act. Barry gets to revisit his pseudo-Asian writing, and some of it’s pretty nice. The film’s song is sung by Lulu. I actually have a bit of a soft spot for the song, even if it’s really silly and way too frenetic.

Next up was The Spy Who Loved Me, which boasts a terrific title song (Carly Simon’s “Nobody Does It Better”, which if not for “Goldfinger” would probably be the series’s best known song) and a frankly awful score by Marvin Hamlisch. I hate this score, and it’s my second-least favorite in the series. Its sound is dominated by outlandish 70s funk stuff, sounding downright disco at times. The score does nothing to help the film establish a sense of suspense, and the underwater music just stands out as awful when considered alongside Barry’s underwater music for Thunderball.

Luckily, Barry would return for Moonraker, in which he gives us a score that’s one of the slowest I’ve ever heard. Seriously, in terms of tempo, this score is one slow cue after another. It’s not a bad score, at all, and it’s got some really nice moments, but wow, is it slow. It’s like listening to a symphony where every movement is marked “Andante”. (Not “adagio”; that would be too slow.) Barry also reuses his “007” secondary theme for Bond, not heard since Diamonds are Forever (it’s heard during the Brazil boat chase). This film would also kick off a new habit of Barry’s, that he would use in each of his remaining Bond scores, using the James Bond Theme in the film as an action cue for the respective film’s silliest chase scene (although that point is debatable in A View to a Kill).

Barry would leave again for For Your Eyes Only, so scoring duties would be taken over by Bill Conti. He takes the “Disco Bond” approach again, but this time it works a lot better; first of all, he wisely limits the “Disco” sound to the action cues, using a more traditional sound for the “normal” scenes; second, the action cues work very, very well. This score has some addictively listenable stuff inside it. The main weak point comes at the very end, though; after some wonderfully atmospheric writing for Bond’s ascent of St. Cyril’s, the score mainly becomes plodding suspense stuff after that. But to that point it’s all very good, with some orchestral and techno effects used to create the kind of unique atmosphere that Barry did in his glory years in the 60s. Sheena Easton’s song is a nice 80s ballad, and interestingly, this is the only time that the singer of the song actually appeared in the opening credits sequence.

Barry came back again for 1983’s Octopussy, which would be the first of his final three Bond scores. It’s a good score, although not really one of his best. Barry’s onetime skill at giving each of his Bond scores a distinctive sound of its own, evocative of the film’s character or location, isn’t terribly on display here, aside from a bit of Indian percussion here and there. Still, the action cues are well-crafted, and there’s some very nice tension-filled scoring for the knife-wielding twins as they chase down 009. Rita Coolidge’s song isn’t bad, if you’re into the kind of song you hear on radio stations that tout themselves as presenting “the best soft rock of the 70s and 80s”. The song makes for some nice love music during the score, but as a Bond song, it’s not terribly exciting.

A View to a Kill would be Roger Moore’s final appearance as Bond, and Barry gave him one of his better scores. The action music is raucous and fun, with nice use of electric guitar, and the love music makes impressive use of a title song (by Duran Duran) that wouldn’t at first hearing seem to lend itself to that sort of thing.

Barry would wrap up his James Bond tenure for good with The Living Daylights, the first of Timothy Dalton’s two Bond films, and in my view, he would end his tenure with one of his best scores of the series. It’s a richly melodic score, using not just the title song (by a ha, whom Barry apparently found difficult to work with) as a basis for action cues, but also two songs by The Pretenders: “Where Has Everybody Gone?” and “If There Was a Man”, the latter of which forms the basis of the film’s love music. Highly notable is the wonderfully atmospheric music that accompanies Bond and Kara’s trek across Afghanistan. TLD is a highlight of the series.

For Licence to Kill, the producers turned to Michael Kamen, who was making a name for himself in the late 80s scoring action films like the Lethal Weapon series. (His biggest successes, such as his score to Robin Hood: Prince of Thieves, were still in the future.) Kamen’s score to Licence is something of a mixed bag. On balance I like its different approach and sound, befitting a film that dared to venture afield from the typical Bond formulae. It’s less melodic, but it’s got its own sound, which I appreciate. The film’s two songs, the title number sung by Gladys Knight and “If You Asked Me To”, are decent if not terribly notable songs.

After a six year absence, Bond would return to the screen with Pierce Brosnan in the role for Goldeneye, a terrific film that only really suffers in a major way in one area of production: its score. The producers went with Eric Serra, who turned in what is, to my ears, the single worst score ever written for a Bond film. It’s full of techno sounds that are awfully distracting, it boasts no notable melodies at all, and it only really works as a score at the very end of the film, during the final fight between Bond and Trevelyan. I don’t like this score at all. Bleecchh. (I’m not a big fan of Tina Turner’s song, either.)

For Tomorrow Never Dies, the Bond producers brought in one of the brighter film music voices to emerge during the 1990s, David Arnold. Arnold’s work seems to pretty sharply divide film music fans; in my experience he’s one of those “love him or hate him” types of composers. I like his work, especially his Bond work. His sound is often evocative of Barry, without aping him too closely. Arnold does tend to use a techno approach quite heavily, especially in his action cues. This can bother some listeners, but I generally find it enjoyable for the most part. TND has two songs: a title number by Sheryl Crow that’s just OK, and a really good song by kd lang that is used on the end credits and actually forms the melodic basis of much of Arnold’s score, which seems to suggest that this song was originally to be the main one before Crow was brought on board.

The World is Not Enough features a song by Garbage that I actually like a lot. TWINE is such an odd film; it’s got some really great stuff going for it but it also has this awful tendency to shoot itself in the foot. Arnold’s score satisfies the film’s needs nicely, though. (There’s actually a second song on the album that wasn’t used in the film; I wonder if it tested poorly in some way.)

Die Another Day has Arnold doing much the same thing as in the previous two films. If there’s a criticism to be made of Arnold’s Bond scores, it’s precisely that: there often isn’t a whole lot that sets them apart, soundwise. The title song by Madonna has been largely derided because it’s a very techno-oriented song. I don’t hate it, but it’s very far from being one of my favorites. In truth, I’ve listened to DAD very few times since I bought the CD when the film came out.

Finally, David Arnold was retained for Casino Royale, despite that film’s status as a reboot for the franchise. He took a terrific approach here, often hinting at the James Bond Theme without actually quoting it directly until the very end of the film. Chris Cornell provides a really good song, “You Know My Name”, which he then for some unimaginably stupid reason refused to allow to be presented on the film’s soundtrack album. Why? Who knows? There can’t be a smart reason for that. Arnold’s score is much more emotional in nature, befitting one of the most emotional Bond films.

And that brings us to Quantum of Solace. Stay tuned….

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Just shoot, dummy!!!

Ooooh! I’m always finding out about cool Blog-a-thons after they’ve happened, so I’m never able to participate, but this time I can. This will be the first post of two in honor of Lazy Eye Theatre’s James Bond Blog-a-thon!

This first one will be a quickie, but here’s a neat video: every opening “gunbarrel” sequence from every Bond film. How fun to watch this iconic visual make its evolution through the series!


Some observations:

:: The early ones are all really slow, aren’t they? I mean, Bond just walks along as slowly as possible. (Of course, it’s not even Sean Connery until Thunderball; that’s a stuntman or something like that.)

:: Watching all of these, I always wonder about the bad guy with the gun: why doesn’t he just shoot, if he’s always got Bond dead-to-rights for something like six or seven seconds before Bond whips around and shoots him?! Especially in those first couple of gunbarrel sequences, when Bond’s movement into the shooting position is so drawn out that he’s practically shouting “I’m gonna shoot you now, Mr. Assassin Who Thinks He’s Got the Drop On Me!”

:: Connery always drops down a bit, but stays on his feet; George Lazenby actually drops to his right knee for the kill shot. Roger Moore’s shooting stance is to put his feet close together and use his left hand to steady his right arm (his shooting arm). Timothy Dalton returns to a Connery-like stance, whipping his left arm behind him and dropping down a bit. Pierce Brosnan shoots one-handed as well, but doesn’t drop down his stance at all. His is probably the quickest delivery of the shot.

:: Moore’s the first one to not wear a hat.

:: From The Spy Who Loved Me on, Moore is always wearing a tux when he shoots Mr. Gunbarrel.

:: With Thunderball, the sequence started ending with the “shifting white dot” dissolving into a part of the opening scene, and then irising outward to let us into the entire shot. This would remain the practice until For Your Eyes Only, when after the white dot shows us a piece of the opening scene, we just cut all the way right to it without the irising-outward effect.

:: Never Say Never Again was not an “official” Bond film, so no gunbarrel sequence. They did try to do something that suggests the graphical style of Bond films, though. I rather liked it, actually.

:: For most of the films until the Brosnan era, the shifting-white-dot moves down to the lower right corner, dissolves to a bit of the opening scene, and then either irises out from there or moves back to the center of the screen before irising out. The Brosnan films would move the shifting-dot all over the place, each time. For The World Is Not Enough, it actually dissolves to Bond’s face, the first time that Bond is the first thing we see as we emerge from the gunbarrel sequence.

:: Brosnan’s gunbarrel isn’t static-looking either; the gunbarrel itself reflects the shifting light as it tracks Bond’s movement.

:: Die Another Day added a digital bullet ripping right at the viewer. I’ve never been able to decide if I liked this or if it bothered me.

:: Casino Royale‘s teaser sequence actually ends with the introduction of the gunbarrel sequence, which was one of the niftier things about that movie. I always thought it would have been cool if they could have worked in a reverse-gunbarrel sequence of some sort into the film’s ending, just after Bond finally gets to utter the words “The name’s Bond. James Bond.” Our old friend, the shifting dot, would appear in reverse, irising down to just Bond’s face before fading to white and then allowing the credits to roll.

But what fun to see them all, back to back; the Bond gunbarrel is one of the most iconic things in movies. I rank it right up there with the MGM lion and the 20th Century Fox fanfare, to be honest.

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How would it be?

The most common adjective I ever hear used anymore to describe Buffalo, or Western New York, or Upstate New York in its entirety, is “dying”. And I suppose that might be accurate. But “dying” implies moving toward a state of death, does it not? So here’s my question: what will “dead” Buffalo look like? How will we know the city or region are dead? I assume the place will never look like the empty streetscape of The Omega Man, so what does it mean for a city to die? Are we literally talking about Western New York eventually looking like North Dakota?

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Food for thought….

Roger Ebert on Lee Greenwood:

Here I was all set to go Elitist on the country singer Lee Greenwood, and I pulled the rug out from under myself. I shared Rachel Maddow’s incredulity that the limping duck George W. Bush had appointed Greenwood to the National Council of the Arts. I even had my first two sentences written in my head: “Remember how the Bush takeover squad at the White House complained the Clintonites had unplugged all the PCs on their way out the door? As he steadfastly marches toward his own sunset, it is Bush himself who seems unplugged.”

Zing! Totally unfair, but snappy, Bush had two vacancies to fill on the NCA, one for three years, one for six. Greenwood got the six-year term. He’ll be the gift that keeps on giving every day during Obama’s first term. The Council’s job is to advise the National Endowment for the Arts on how to spend its money. I assume Greenwood will support the endowment’s Shakespeare in American Communities Initiative, but you can never be sure about those things.

Yada yada yada. But then I did a little research on Lee Greenwood and had to abandon my wisecracks. I concluded that Greenwood’s career makes him a not unreasonable choice for the Council. To begin with, he is the perfect age, my age. He is a singer-songwriter. He built his own theater in Seiverville, Tenn., and performed there from 1995 to 2000. Wiki explains the theater was not located in the “heavily entertainment and tourist-oriented area of Pigeon Forge,” which “contributed to its closing.” Greenwood had the semi-obligatory cocaine addiction around the age of 20, which was not all that common in 1962, but “moved to Iceland to go to rehab.” He is best known for writing and singing “God Bless the USA,” which I do not prefer to Springsteen’s “Born in the USA,” but that’s just me.

Greenwood has lived the American Dream. Raised on a poultry farm outside Sacramento by his grandparents, he started playing the sax at the age of seven. He’s won all the big awards, including Singer of the Year and Song of the Year. He took time off to perform at McCain and Palin rallies. By all accounts he is a thoroughly decent man. Although his background may not parallel all of the other members of the NCA, why should it? He brings a fresh perspective. And there is absolutely no reason why country and western, that most American of musical forms along with jazz and the blues, should not be heard from on the Council.

Interesting stuff. There’s a lot there I didn’t know about Greenwood, whom I’ve only associated with that one song of his (and I don’t even like that song).

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How it might have looked….


Rejected wallpaper for the Blog, originally uploaded by Jaquandor.

In the weeks before I returned to blogging, I decided to tinker with the template a bit, and one idea I considered was making a photo montage to suggest the usual themes of things I’m likely to post about or about me as an individual or whatnot. So I went ahead and made the montage, uploaded it, tested it…and nearly went blind, it made the blog so hard to read. I probably should have seen that coming, but there’s the montage, if anyone’s interested.

UPDATE: And then, I learn that I’ve used up my data transfer for the month. Ugh. I’ll try to have things better around here later on.

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Some days it rains….

Steve Benen wonders why on Earth it is that Sarah Palin still commands lots of attention, even after being a disastrous running mate on a failed Presidential ticket:

Yesterday afternoon, Atrios noted, “Sarah Palin is still getting more press attention than Joe the Biden, and he’s going to be Vice President and she’s not.” Soon after, CNN’s Jack Cafferty added, “When’s the last time a losing vice presidential candidate was still in the news a week after the election? Nobody seems interested in interviewing Joe Biden, or for that matter, John McCain. But we just don’t seem to be able to get enough of Sarah Palin.”

They’re both right, of course. Palin was a ridiculous candidate on a failed ticket. Her candidacy was a national embarrassment, and insult to our political system. And yet, like a car crash, it’s hard to turn away.

At first blush, it’s hard to put one’s finger on why, exactly. Maybe we haven’t quite gotten out of “campaign mode.” Or perhaps some are thinking ahead, keeping an eye on Palin with an expectation that she’ll seek national office again fairly soon.

But I think it’s more than that. Kevin noted this afternoon, “We’ve simply never seen someone so completely unmoored from the normal requirements of national office before.” I not only think that’s right, I also think we’re still coming to terms with just how serious this fiasco really was.

Well, as Annie Savoy points out in Bull Durham, “The world is made for people who aren’t cursed with self-awareness.” But Palin’s just a lot more entertaining than all those boring people like the guy who is actually going to be the Vice President, and if anything, our media now insists that news be entertaining. Why else is it that when I go online on Monday mornings, on the “Entertainment” section of my homepage (MSN.com), they always have among the headlines of actual goings-on in the entertainment industry the events of the previous night’s episode of Desperate Housewives?

As George Carlin pointed out regarding the fact that Mickey Mouse’s birthday gets reported as though it’s an actual event, “No wonder nobody in the world takes our country seriously! We waste valuable television time informing our citizens of the age of an imaginary rodent!”

Sarah Palin is the perfect political media star for the unserious media.

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