“If God does not love you, how could you have done the things you’ve done?”

(UPDATED twice below.)

So asks a Muslim nobleman of Balian of Ibelin near the end of Ridley Scott’s movie Kingdom of Heaven. Balian, who has been seeking God’s will through the entire film, makes no real answer as he takes his leave of Jerusalem, yielding to the Muslims who, under the leadership of Saladin, have conquered the city. And yet, Balian leaves with the respect, shared mutually, of the Muslim nobles.

Almost three years ago (as of this writing; more than that, as of this posting), I watched Kingdom of Heaven and was, as has been my typical experience with Ridley Scott’s movies, underwhelmed. I didn’t dislike the film, per se, but I found it curiously uninvolving and emotionally cool, despite the typical Scott production values. (The film is utterly gorgeous, one wonderful shot after another, but more on that later.)

I learned a while later that the film was a victim of the all-too-common movie malady, the dreaded Studio Cut, in which a director makes a movie the way the director wants, but when he screens it for the executives, they dislike it and mandate a whole bunch of cuts. In the case of Kingdom of Heaven, a three-hour epic that took its time telling its story was forced to become a two-hour pseudo-epic that felt overstuffed and, at the same time, underexplained. So, when it came time for the DVD release, Scott was allowed to restore the material he hadn’t wanted cut — almost an entire hour’s worth of material.

Now, not all movies are helped by indulging directors’ desires to stick stuff back into the films for DVD releases. But many are, with some movies – the Lord of the Rings films, for example – so benefit by their expansions that the “Extended editions” become the canonical versions. Really, who watches the theatrical cuts of LOTR anymore? Kingdom of Heaven benefits from Scott’s revisiting to a frankly amazing degree: the movie was a serviceable medieval war story, but now, in its Extended Director’s Cut, it’s a stunning epic. As I watched its story unfold, I kept thinking to myself, “Why didn’t I like this movie this much last time?” And I was often hard-pressed to come up with an answer. Even though it’s been three years since I saw the theatrical cut and thus can’t remember it well enough to definitively say what’s been added and what has not. (Upon further review, the entire subplot of King Baldwin IV’s nephew, who would become King when Baldwin IV dies, is new to this version.) This isn’t a movie with a few scenes added just to get you to buy the DVD. Nor is it an Extended version with lots of new scenes that enhance the movie you’ve already seen. So much has been restored for this version that it’s an entirely new movie.

The story is one of those “Poor stiff finds fame and glory in a far-away land” tales. Balian (Orlando Bloom) is the blacksmith in a French village; as the film opens, he is mourning his wife, who has committed suicide after losing her baby. Soon a band of Crusaders returns to the region, including a man (Liam Neeson) who is now a Baron in the Holy Land, and who turns out to be Balian’s father. After some nastiness, Balian has no choice but to leave his home and travel to the Holy Land himself, not so much as a Crusader but as a man seeking favor with God after committing sinful acts. On his way he makes friends and enemies, some of whom are Muslim and some of whom are fellow Christians; he becomes embroiled in all manner of political intrigue in the Holy Land at the time when the King of Jerusalem (Baldwin IV) is a leper who is nearing death and when the Muslims have found their greatest leader, Saladin, who is winning victory after victory. Balian finds himself involved with Sibylla, and toward the end of the film, he finds himself charged with the defense of Jerusalem itself.

Scott is, as ever, a visual genius, and there’s nary a shot in this entire film that doesn’t have something interesting going on. His Holy Land, hot and bright and dusty, contrasts with his Europe, which is cold and wind-swept and a place where snow is constantly fluttering down from gray skies. The sets are opulent and magnificent, and the long shots of medieval Jerusalem, created by computer, manage to look authentic. I’ve never questioned Ridley Scott’s skills as a visual director, but I’ve always found his movies somehow uninvolving on the human side – until this one, or at least, this version of this one. Watching Kingdom of Heaven now, in its longer version, I found my attention never wandering at all.

The film is full of fine performances. Orlando Bloom plays Balian, and it’s a good performance, if not especially wide-ranged. It seems to be accepted wisdom that Bloom is a bad actor and mainly a pretty face, but I don’t think that’s fair; he strikes me as a British version of Kevin Costner, a guy who may not have the wide range of quite a few better actors, but whose performances are better than typically seen and who, in the right role, can actually shine. Eva Green plays Sibylla, a woman caught between love and duty to her nation and her son, with lots of emotion that looks forward to her turn as James Bond’s first great lover in Casino Royale. The supporting cast is superb across the board, with not a single false note in the entire cast. Most notable is Edward Norton, who embodies King Baldwin IV; what’s amazing about him is that the King wears a silver mask in all of his scenes, owing to his disfigurement from leprosy. With no ability to call on facial expressions or even eye movements, Norton nevertheless conveys a wide range of feeling in his performance, so much so that this film is a good answer for anyone who has ever wondered how convincing Greek drama must have been, with all of those performers in their masks.

Many of the film’s events are drawn from true history; Baldwin IV really did die young of leprosy, and his successor, Baldwin V, did die at the age of nine. There was a Queen Sibylla who ruled alongside King Guy; there really was a Balian of Ibelin. Raymond of Chatillon really did suffer the fate depicted herein. It’s not strictly accurate history, obviously, but this movie treats its subject matter with respect. This isn’t a movie like the Pirates of the Caribbean films, which exist in a cheerfully-ahistorical timeline. And the film’s villains aren’t exclusively Muslims, nor are they exclusively Christians. There are honorable men and women on both sides, which is a pretty remarkable stance for this film to have taken given that it was made in the days following the 9-11-01 attacks.

The music for the film is by Harry Gregson Williams, a composer who has emerged over the last decade as a potentially exciting new voice (his most notable work is for the Narnia films). Here he writes a score that blends medieval European religious chant with soundscapes evocative of the Middle East, resulting in a score that is often captivating. The only down part of the score is the odd use, in a late scene in which Balian must give a rousing speech to the inadequate defenders of Jerusalem, of a cue from Jerry Goldsmith’s score to the movie The Thirteenth Warrior. I have no idea what possessed Ridley Scott to use this music here, when Gregson Williams has written an otherwise wonderful score for this fairly meditative epic, but Scott has a long history of making odd decisions with regard to the music for his films, so who knows. A regular viewer watching the movie probably wouldn’t even notice that there’s a melody heard in that scene that never occurs in any other part of the movie; they’d only notice that the music there is nicely rousing for a scene that’s rousing in nature. But a film music geek like me? That stands out like the proverbial sore thumb.

I’m glad Ridley Scott was afforded the opportunity to revisit this film. It really is a superior effort; it’s most certainly my favorite film by Ridley Scott. I can’t recommend it highly enough. (And now I’m actually looking forward to Scott’s announced project on the Robin Hood legend.)

UPDATE: My take on Orlando Bloom as an actor isn’t taken well at an Orlando Bloom message board, which strikes me as odd, since I openly state he’s not a bad actor. I actually think he’s pretty good. He’s not Olivier, or Ian McKellen, or Daniel Day-Lewis, but Bloom does perfectly well in the movies I’ve seen him in. He’s fine in Lord of the Rings, he’s fine in the Pirates of the Caribbean flicks, he’s good in Elizabethtown, and he’s good in Kingdom of Heaven. I’m not sure what their point of contention is, unless they’re of the view that I’m actually not being sufficiently effusive in my praise of Bloom as an actor. I’m not often taken to task for not being nice enough in my compliments, but there it is. I just know that most times I see Orlando Bloom mentioned, and people rip on him as being a bad actor, which I think is pretty wrong-headed.

I guess you can’t please everybody.

UPDATE II: Now that some more replies have popped up at the message board thread linked above, I see that the main point of contention seems to be my comparison of Orlando Bloom to Kevin Costner. I wasn’t making a one-to-one comparison of the men as actors, but I cited Costner as an example of another actor whose work I think tends to be unfairly maligned. No, Costner wasn’t a particularly great Robin Hood, but he’s really good a lot more often than a lot of stuffy cinema folks like to admit. (Bull Durham, Dances With Wolves, Tin Cup, Field of Dreams, A Perfect World, and JFK are all good examples, to my mind. And frankly, if I concede that Bloom would make a better Robin Hood than Costner did, surely one must also agree that Bloom could not play Crash Davis anywhere near as well as Costner did!) That’s all I meant with that comparison. So when I say that I see Orlando Bloom as a younger, British version of Costner, I do not mean that as an insult.

BTW, folks over there, you’re welcome to comment here too! I don’t bite. Not usually, anyway.

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Answers!!!

Finally getting back to the questions of Ask Me Anything! 2009, here are a few answers.

First up, reader and frequent commenter (especially when I give voice to my Inner Liberal!) DaveS asks:

As a movie guy Did you Like Siskel & Ebert? Which one did you prefer?

I loved Siskel and Ebert. Loved ’em. During the 90s, they were usually on where we lived on Sundays at 10:00 or maybe it was 11:00; I watched faithfully. Their main corporate sponsor at the time was, appropriately enough, Orville Reddenbacher Popcorn. As entertaining as it was to listen to them disagree, I got more out of it when they agreed on movies, because that almost always meant that it meant something good. I honestly don’t recall ever seeing a movie that got “Two Thumbs Up!” that I personally didn’t like. I also loved how they didn’t just constrain themselves to the newest blockbusters and major releases; they’d frontload the show with those sorts of films, but toward the end they’d discuss the smaller films, the documentaries, the indie films, the foreign films, and that sort of thing. The show, for just its half hour a week, was never just about how good the newest Schwarzenegger flick was.

There was never anything cynical in the approach Siskel and Ebert took; each man showed a fierce love of film that always shone through, even when they disagreed. I recall one argument the two men had once that led to Ebert saying to Siskel, “I don’t think you wanted to like the movie”, to which a shocked Siskel replied, “How can you say that? I love to like movies!” Lots of critics write with a tone that implies that they are genuinely surprised every time they like a movie; Siskel and Ebert never seemed that way.

As to which man I liked more, I’d probably have to say Ebert, although that’s not so much based on the show as the fact that Ebert has had significantly greater visibility over the years, between his prolific writings on film and the fact that Ebert is still alive. I honestly don’t recall reading much of Siskel’s work, so I have no idea what kind of writer he was. But he and Ebert had a wonderful chemistry that has obviously not been duplicated since, even if Ebert had a decent partnership with Richard Roeper.

There seems to be a consensus that Ebert’s writing has improved substantially since his bouts with cancer rendered him unable to speak. I’m not sure if it has; Ebert’s always been a fine writer. More likely the attention has been focused more on his writing, now that that is his only real avenue for expression.

But yeah: I liked Siskel and Ebert a great deal.

More answers to come!

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Something for Thursday

Natasha Richardson wasn’t in Love Actually, but her husband, Liam Neeson, was, and in that film he played a role he can now sadly play in real life: a bereaved husband.

From Love Actually, here is the Glasgow Love Theme, by composer Craig Armstrong. You can ignore the slideshow of images from the film; I selected this clip because the sound is better than some others.

Sigh….

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Natasha

UPDATE: Dammit.

Best wishes for a speedy and complete recovery to actress Natasha Richardson, who was critically injured in a skiing accident earlier today. She’s a beautiful and intelligent actress whose work I always enjoy.

Richardson is married to Liam Neeson, one of my favorite actors. They starred together in Nell, a movie I didn’t like, but not through any fault of the principal actors.

(Image courtesy natasha-richardson.org.)

UPDATE: As noted above, Natasha Richardson has died of her injuries. Awful, awful news.

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Untitled Post

Continuing my answers to questions posed in this year’s edition of Ask Me Anything!, we have a set of queries from Mark.

1. Do you suppose that Trekkies will be further degraded or taken more seriously from now on because of this incident?

The incident in question is a robbery that took place in Colorado Springs, where someone held up a convenience store using a bat’leth as their weapon. And what, non-Trek fans, is a “bat’leth”? It’s a Klingon double-bladed sword, like this:

Well, I suppose Trekkies (or Trekkers) can never really make up ground, even as comic book fare becomes more and more mainstream. But this will certainly help the bat’leth to be taken more seriously, won’t it! I wouldn’t mess with someone toting one of those around. Unless I had a phaser on me. Or a lightsaber. (Sorry to mix my franchises.)

2. Should the NFL expand to 40 teams in our lifetime? Will it?

It shouldn’t, and I greatly doubt that it will, unless it starts going “International”, and even then, some logistical problems would be created. If there were teams in Europe, those teams would probably have structural advantages owing to constantly facing teams with jet lag, right? And I’m just not sure there are enough cities in the US or even Canada who are willing to stomach the costs that come with the operation of an NFL team. Maybe I’m wrong, but I’m thinking – or maybe hoping – that the current economic disaster will forever crush the ability of NFL teams and their owners to basically strong-arm municipalities into building and maintaining stadiums. I think the whole thing has just become completely insane: erecting billion-dollar palaces for sporting events that take place about a dozen times a year? The whole thing is just ludicrous.

The other argument against continual NFL expansion is that the talent pool for the teams would continue to become shallower and shallower. There are currently 32 teams in the NFL; the addition of another eight teams would add 424 players to the league, just on the active rosters. Are there really 424 players currently in the college ranks who are of NFL calibre? I doubt this.

I think the NFL is, frankly, big enough.

3. Have you listened to the Storied Northwest on iTunes yet?

No. I don’t even have iTunes. But I’ll look into them, in some way!

We’ll do more answers…sometime soon!

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Light blogging ahead….

Sorry folks, but I’m in the midst of a busy week, so posting may be lighter than usual. Sentential Links will return next week, while I’m at it. I’ll have some new stuff up here at some point, but for right now I just have a lot of projects that need attending to, plus some other stuff going on in the Musty Land of Real Life that will occupy some time. Bear with!

(And don’t forget to vote in the poll in the sidebar: What should I read next?)

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Sunday Burst of Weirdness

Oddities abound!

But not quite as much this week, and I was busy for most of today, so just a couple of strange things, one of which wasn’t even something I saw online, but…ach, let’s just get on with it:

:: Some guy on CNN had a guest on, discussing politics and whatnot, and the CNN guy asked his guest if President Obama was “trying to brazenly deceive the American people”. Who was the guest of whom this question was asked? Dick Cheney. Well, he oughta know, huh? I mean, if you want to talk about someone brazenly deceiving the American people, you can’t do much worse than Bush’s VP….

:: One reason I didn’t post much today was that I was catching up on my episodes of 24, since I was three behind and didn’t want to fall four behind after tomorrow night’s ep. At the beginning of the last of the three episodes I had to watch, the obligatory guest star listing was scrolling by as the show began, and one name caught my eye. It looks like Jack Bauer might be joined by the other great anti-terrorist crusader of our time! Woo-hoo!

Can’t you see those two working together? “Yippee-ki-yay, motherf–” “We’re running out of time!!!”

That’s about it. More next week. Unidentified Earth will return next week as well.

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Make Me Read!

OK, I decided that what this blog needs is a new feature. So here’s a new feature. Over there on the sidebar — go ahead and look, you might need to scroll down slightly, so I’ll wait for you to come back…waiting…waiting…OK, we’re back — you’ll see a little poll. I’ve been waffling on my 2009 Guy Gavriel Kay Re-read project, as to whether I should just plow through everything he’s ever written at once or alternate other books in between. I’ve decided on the latter, because I want a little bit of time to reflect on the preceding GGK book each time I come to the next one, and because I fear the latter books in his output may suffer during this project if I don’t “clear my literary palate”, so to speak. Thus, I will read other books in between each GGK book. But what other books?

And that’s where you come in, readers! What I’m going to do is each time I begin a GGK book (or thereabouts, roughly, kinda-sorta speaking) I’ll choose two options for the next thing I read, which will then appear in a poll over in the sidebar — it’s right near the top, just below the link to The Promised King. Readers will vote, and whichever book gets the most votes will be the one I read after the current GGK tome. (I may keep doing this after I get all the way through GGK, picking my own books and then polling results for the alternating books, depending on how this experiment goes.)

If the books are tied when the poll closes (I think it’s set up for a week), I’ll flip a coin between the two books. Now, what kinds of books will I offer as options? Well, sometimes I’ll choose literary works; other times I’ll choose graphic novels, or works of classic SF, or just about anything I can think of. For the inaugural Make Me Read! poll, the choices are:

A Farewell to Arms, by Ernest Hemingway

and

The Bell Jar, by Sylvia Plath

Why did I choose these two? No particular reason. I just have copies on hand neither of which I’ve read yet. So I leave it up to you all! Which one do I read after I finish The Fionavar Tapestry later this week? Vote in the sidebar!

(I should point out that I’ll only be doing this for my fiction reading; I tend to be all over the map with my nonfic, and I may need to set aside the poll winner for a bit if review novels come in that need to be kicked out of the way. I do need some wiggle room, but this should work.)

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Answering Anything!

More Ask Me Anything! 2009 answers ahead! Beware!

A reader dropped into my December 2008 post on working at Pizza Hut, and asks why the one that closed in Olean, the one near Wal-Mart, stopped its delivery business in the mid-90s. He wonders if this was because of prank orders placed by students at nearby St. Bonaventure University, but my recollection is that there weren’t too many prank orders. In fact, we didn’t get pranked too much at either location. There was one kid who would, for a while, faithfully call the other Pizza Hut in Olean, the one where I worked the bulk of my PH tenure, once every other week or so with an order for fifteen large pepperoni pizzas. I just played along, gave him a price, told him we’d be there in 45 minutes or whatever, and then delete the order and ignore the whole thing. Nobody ever called to complain, so I know I wasn’t scotching a real order; I wonder if that kid really thought there was a PH driver wandering around town with his fifteen pizzas sent to a fake address. But who cared, really.

Another funny delivery story: I had a woman call once to order pizzas for the nurses at some department in Olean General Hospital. She made it sound like she was sending them pizza to thank them for their treatment of her, but I’m not so sure, because she was very insistent on the toppings: two larges, topped with black olives and achovies. I didn’t know what to make of that, but her credit card payment went through, so we went with it.

We also had lots of entertaining discussions (read: annoying discussions) with customers who refused to understand the difference between the city limits that denoted the boundary of where we would deliver and the town limits. The refrain was automatic, every time: “My mail comes to Olean, NY! How can you tell me you won’t deliver to me!” “Because you don’t live within the city limits, sir.” “But my mail comes to Olean, NY!” Lather, rinse, repeat.

But anyway, back to the original query. Delivery was stopped at the other Olean location (commonly called the Allegany location, even though it was located within the Olean town limits but not the Olean city limits – there we go again!) not because of prank orders but because there just weren’t enough orders on a consistent basis to make delivery worth the effort. Now, it’s hard for me to recall, since it’s nearly fifteen years since I worked there and since even when I was there, it was just as a cook so I wasn’t paying attention to numbers, but I do recall entire weekday evenings passing by where we might get two or three delivery orders total. That wasn’t nearly enough delivery business to justify having those extra employees around. As far as St. Bonaventure went, orders for delivery to SBU constituted a small portion of our already-small delivery business. Our deliveries went more to the Village of Allegany than the University, by a significant margin. SBU was just not a business driver for that PH location.

Why was this? I don’t know. I suspect that first of all, PH’s prices tend to be higher than most college students are probably willing to pay for pizza. Second, in terms of location, that PH was farther from campus than a number of other local pizza joints, as well as the local Domino’s outlet. More SBU students probably got pizza either from Domino’s (which is literally across the street from SBU) or from the two or three pizza joints in the village of Allegany, which is where all the bars are. There weren’t any bars near PH, so it wasn’t really possible to include PH in one’s plans if said plans involved college-student levels of drinking.

One night I very much remember was a night when our main delivery driver came bursting in from one of his delivery runs to inform us that OJ Simpson was on the run in a white Bronco, and the cops were chasing him on the LA freeways. He kept coming back with updates every time he went out with another run. That was pretty hilarious.

On the general subject of Olean and pizza, I always felt like something of an outsider because I never much liked either of the two beloved Olean pizza joints: Tasta Pizza and Renna’s Pizza. Renna’s is basically a local version of Sbarro, and Tasta was, as I recall, terribly lame. Their pizza was square (no big deal) but the pepperoni pizza came with one slice of pepperoni per slice. A slice of pepperoni pizza there was basically a square of cheese pizza with a single pepperoni slice in the exact middle. I don’t know if that’s still how they do it, but wow, was that lame. Our preferred pizza there was a place called A&J’s.

In an odd postscript to all this, it turns out that now both Pizza Huts in Olean are now closed. After the Allegany one closed due to poor business, apparently an electrical fire did sufficient damage to the other one, the larger one I worked at for three-and-a-half years, to force its closing. I have not seen any indication that it has re-opened, so I assume it’s still sitting there. Now, I have no real insight here, but I do recall that PH had a tendency to do things, shall we say, “on the cheap”, so it wouldn’t surprise me one whit if that fire was seen by the local PH brass as a blessing in disguise: another opportunity to save money by shuttering a location. This is just pure speculation on my part, mind you.

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Something for Thursday

Something a bit different for today. Celestial Navigations is a group that does music and storytelling, featuring actor Geoffrey Lewis doing the spoken-word bits. Here’s a selection of theirs, “The Winner”.

Since this week I’ve seen a whole bunch of instances of blogs with much higher traffic than mine commenting on things I’d commented on days before, with my teeny-tiny traffic, this particular selection’s been on my mind.

I ain’t makin’ a move, I ain’t sayin’ a word…until somebody links me!

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