“Excitement is created by rhythmic accuracy”

So said a music teacher I had once, who was trying to convince those of us under his baton that a piece of music played cleanly and accurately at a slower tempo will sound faster than the same piece played sloppily at a faster one. It’s a hard lesson to internalize, but, listen to the rhythmic precision on display in this performance of Shostakovich’s Festive Overture. It’s something to behold. This is a piece that will not be convincing in any way if the performers are not working with the utmost precision in mind.

That’s one of my favorite pieces, by the way.

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A quiz thing!

Roger has a brief quiz thing, and here it is:

If you could go back in time and relive one moment, what would it be?

One moment from my life? Wow, I’m not sure. Maybe the birth of The Daughter, or my wedding, or the first date with The Wife.

If you could go back in time and change one thing, what would it be?

I’d propose to The Girlfriend (now The Wife) earlier. In fact, I’d propose, period. I had her ring on order when she proposed.

What movie/TV char­acter do you most resemble in per­son­ality?

Wow, this is a tougher question than it looks. Maybe Andy Sipowicz from NYPDBlue, without a lot of the baggage (like the bigotry). I’d like to be like Scotty from Star Trek, with the whole “miracle worker” thing. Or…yeah, that’s a hard question.

If you could push one person off a cliff and get away with it, who would it be?

Some randomly-selected right-wing FOX News talking head, I suppose. But it would be a really low cliff, with something soft to break the fall. Like, say, a pile of manure.

Name one habit you want to change in your­self.

My desire to push Republicans into piles of manure. That is not the stuff of which good discourse is made!

Describe your­self in one word.

Verbose.

Describe the person who named you in this meme in one word.

Well-rounded! (Roger’s interested in a lot of stuff.)

Why do you blog? (In one sen­tence)

Because the world just isn’t complete without my thoughts on stuff like the costume in the new Superman movie, or the unappreciated merits of the Star Wars prequels, or how much the Buffalo Bills stink, or the latest space opera novel, or rhapsodic paeans to bib overalls, or why Upstate New York is awesome and should be the best place on the planet, or what types of pies are ideal for throwing, or random thoughts on hand or power tools, or the excessive use of commas to stretch single sentences out to ridiculous lengths.

Tags? Whosoever wishes this quiz is tagged!

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Answers, the second!

Time to clear out some more Answers from Ask Me Anything! August 2011, huzzah!

Jenny (of Saturday Centus fame) has a couple:

Were you the kid in school always getting in trouble for using the red crayon to color the sky and the blue crayon to color the grass? I was.

I did that, a bit. I was also never one to stay inside the lines. The lines sucked. I hated the lines. The lines were evil. I do remember my kindergarten teacher getting irritated when I colored a person orange, which I did because orange was the closest thing to that ‘flesh’ crayon that Crayola used to make, but which I didn’t have in my box. (I assume they still make that color, but call it something else, right? Something that doesn’t assume that ‘flesh’ is, well, white?)

What I remember as particularly frustrating was that creativity was generally to be exercised mainly in Art classes, and I was terrible at art. Just terrible. So other kids were being all creative and stuff, and there I was, trying to make sure that the clay ashtray was in the shape of a heart in the first place. And if memory serves, I didn’t include the little divots in the sides, where smokers lay their cigarettes. How was I to know? My parents weren’t smokers. And besides, how weird was it, anyway, that in school we were actually required to make an ashtray? Yeah, it was 1977 and all, but Ye Gods, here were schools just assuming that we all lived with smokers! Wow.

Creative writing assignments, however? Those didn’t come down the pike all that often, and when they did, I didn’t much like them, because the topics would be assigned by a teacher. I’m not sure why this bugged me so much, but it did. I recall one assignment called “Turkey Talk”, in which we were to write about Thanksgiving from the perspective of the bird. Now, if you tell me to write that story today, I’m seizing the opportunity and writing a horrifically bloody tale about the turkeys who achieved sentience and staged a rebellion at the abbatoir. Back then, however, my brain just shut down. (In that particular case, I did the smart thing and…just didn’t do the damn assignment. Brilliant plan, that. Especially when my parents found out that I had adopted a personal policy of “I’m just not gonna do the stupid assignments.”)

Writing just wasn’t much encouraged in my school years, sadly enough. I never really knew why; maybe it was just out of fashion back then. Maybe it still is. I craved the assignments — very rare — where we were simply given a genre and told to write something in that genre. (And then there was the “write a piece of descriptive prose” assignment, wherein I wrote a detailed description of the girl I had a crush on at the time. In retrospect, holy shit, was that creepy.)

Music, which was my other passion, employed a rather different kind of creativity. The only real outlet at the time for creating something new, musically-speaking, was in jazz band and improv solos. My problem there was that I was simply never really temperamentally inclined toward jazz. I like to listen to it, and I was a serviceable section player, but soloing just wasn’t something I was born to do. Go figure.

So, going back to writing and whatnot…I see the Centus prompts as a way of, well, making up for lost time. And apologizing to that English teacher whom I refused to take seriously in 8th grade.

I did want to ask if you’d like to be a guest blogger for me.

Sure! I’ve never been asked to guest-blog. This is exciting. Let me know what you’re thinking of!

Reader Bill asks:

Have you kept your trumpet chops up? If not why not?

Sadly, no, I have not. The answers are all the usual suspects: time, opportunity, and life’s other pursuits. I sometimes wonder how I’d sound if I picked up the trumpet again right now, and how long it would take me to recover some reasonable percentage of the proficiency I had back in the day (and I wasn’t half-bad, really, if I do say so myself). But this is unlikely to happen, so long as I live in an apartment.

Time is not my friend there, as well — I only have so many hours in the day, the same as everybody else, and I’ve gravitated strongly to writing as my prime creative outlet. The time I might spend practicing if I was still a musician is time I now spend writing. And finally, there’s opportunity: my finest musical moments always came when I was a member of one ensemble or another, and I tended to find that the greatest musical rush for me came from being one voice in a group that was hitting on all cylinders. Those are the opportunities that are hardest to come by now. There’s nothing at all wrong with local amateur groups, but…well, I have some pretty heady musical memories, and I’d almost rather keep those memories close in my heart than try to recapture the lightning in a bottle, if that makes sense.

It’s a shame, sometimes. I do miss music now and again, as an active concern.

More answers to come (and new questions are still welcomed, so drop ’em here!)

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Sentential Links #257

Join us for the two-hundred-fifty-seventh iteration of Sentential Links! Or don’t. See if I care. Jerk.

Anyhoo….

:: Watching the world slide slowly back into recession without a fight, even though we know perfectly well how to prevent it, is just depressing beyond words. Our descendents will view the grasping politicians and cowardly bankers responsible for this about as uncomprehendingly as we now view the world leaders who cavalierly allowed World War I to unfold even though they could have stopped it at any time. (That’s actually the entire post, but I agree spot-on.)

:: These are my mother-in-law’s hands, she has arthritis and so her hands are somewhat twisted and gnarled and she can no longer play the piano fully.

:: I was very, very disappointed when I realized it was just a dream and the place doesn’t really exist. I want to go there.

:: Actors hate having to give exposition. It’s dry, it’s informational, it’s not fun. Unfortunately, SOMEONE has deliver the exposition. The trick is to spread it around, find ways to hide it, and make it entertaining. Necessary information woven into a joke is a great solution. (You can switch the word “actors” with “readers” and be equally correct here. In my current Novel-In-Progress, I recently reached a point where some stuff had to be explained, and I was concerned about that passage for quite a while leading up to it. And I’m still concerned about it. My solution was to reveal the absolute smallest amount of information that I had to, and then have someone change the subject. More stuff will get revealed later. I hope that works. Anyway, there’s a reason why my favorite infodump of all time — the “Council of Elrond” chapter in The Fellowship of the Ring — comes about 200 pages or so into the book.)

:: Because if you lock ten children under the stairs for the first eleven years of their lives, I’ll bet you a Time Turner that you’ll get four supervillains, three deeply wounded individuals so desperate for love they will do anything they’re told to by the first person who hugs them, two completely shattered psyches incapable of meaningful speech, and one Harry Potter, a basically normal, gently dented boy who is good at sports, naturally likeable, and willing to sacrifice himself for the group of your choice.

Them’s some long odds, D-man. Glad that worked out for you.

:: So, fans, does that count as a “cop-out”? YOU MAKE THE CALL!! (I call shenanigans.)

:: You could read it in a tree.

You could read it with some tea.

I would not read it in a tree.

I would not read it with some tea.

I do not want to read that book

I will not take a single look. (I knew I should have taken a picture of that book….)

More next week!

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Geekin’

Just a few pop-cultural items knockin’ round my head….

:: I love this poster, for the upcoming film Red Tails, which tells the story of the Tuskegee Airmen and is backed by executive producer George Lucas:

Of course, I look at that poster and I see that Lucas is only the executive producer. He’s not the actual producer, nor did he write the screenplay or the story on which the film is based, nor did he direct the movie. But anyone want to lay odds on whose name gets mentioned exclusively if the film flops?

:: I think that the existence of this is frakking hysterical:

1970 Imaginative Sex

Why? Well, if you know anything about Norman’s somewhat infamous series of sci-fi novels set on the world of Gor, you can imagine just what his sexual recommendations are like (i.e., great if you’re a man and you’re into dominance, not so much if you’re, well, not).

:: I really am starting to get an appreciation for cosplay.

She’s makin’ it up as she goes along, folks!

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Sunday Burst of Weird and AWESOME!

Oddities and Awesome abound!

:: In the “Awesome” camp, we have this righteous rant by Neil deGrasse Tyson, on the subject of NASA and our apparently scaled-back ambitions as a society.

Great stuff. I could not possibly agree more.

:: Here is a fantastic set of wedding photos. Kudos to this happy couple! (Scroll down slowly for best effect. Don’t stop after the first four or five photos.

::: Not that I had a burning desire to go there in the first place, but I really don’t think I’ll be touring the islands of Indonesia any time soon. AIEEE!

More next week!

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Saturday Centus

This week we get 150 words, but we’re not allowed to use pictures. Oh well!

From the liner notes to the remastered If I Die Young, the one album released by Thrash Davis:

He was born Reginald Aloysius Bixby III, so it’s not hard to see why he eventually changed his name to Thrash Davis. His quiet youth ended in his mum’s kitchen when he found a wooden spoon and a saucepan, giving rise to a noisy passion that would last him all his short life. Davis would later revolutionize the drum set in much the same way that EVH revolutionized the guitar….

The title of Thrash’s first-and-only album proved eerily prophetic when his tour blimp crashed into that tire fire, leaving rock lovers worldwide to forever wonder what might have come in future albums, after fiery songs like “Comet Vomit”, “I Hate Jude”, and the ribald “Rhymes with Trucker”….

Mr Dylan can knock all he wants, but Thrash Davis is drum drum drummin’ on Heaven’s door.

Don’t forget — All Centusians are invited to Ask Me Anything!. I’ve started answering questions, but new ones are still welcome!

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Page One: A Tale of Two Cities


Page One: A Tale of Two Cities, originally uploaded by Jaquandor.

I posted about A Tale of Two Cities last week, but I figured it was still a prime candidate for Page One feature.

(BTW, is this feature popular at all amongst the readership? I’m enjoying it, but I’m not sure anyone else is….)

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Da doo Ron Ron….

Politics, below the fold.

Via PZ Myers, we have Ron Paul’s answer to the shocking question, “Do you believe in evolution?” (We’ll just set aside the notion that one can “believe in” evolution, kinda like how one “believes in” Santa Claus.)

I’m not surprised at all to hear Paul say “I don’t accept it, it’s just a theory”. No surprise there whatsoever. But what did catch my ear is his opening, where he says that it’s inappropriate to even ask the question in the first place.

Well, Mr. Paul, I like my Presidents to not be nitwits who disrespect science. Which is yet another reason why no Republican has ever won my vote for President. (Or for anything, really.)

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