You can’t go home again….

Here’s a wonderful article about the literary genesis of two of the 20th century’s most beloved characters, the Hardy Boys. Don’t let the fact that the article is twelve years old dissuade you; it’s a very entertaining and enlightening read. The guy who wrote those books led a fascinating, and surprising, life. But the article is also interesting in capturing a sensation I’m sure if familiar to all people who love to read:

I recently rediscovered my youth. It made me sneeze.

It lay unremembered at the top of a tall bookcase: 15 vintage Hardy Boys novels by Franklin W. Dixon. In getting them down I took a faceful of dust and beetle carapaces.

I carried the books to my favorite rocking chair, beside my favorite lamp, and reverently broke them open to revisit the literature that had inspired in me a lifelong love of language. The pages were as thick as a shirt collar and ochered with age. They smelled the way old books smell, faintly perfumed, quaintly mysterious, like the lining of Great-Grandma’s alligator handbag out in the steamer trunk. I began to read.

Pretty soon a new smell entered the room.

The Hardy Boys stank.

Funny. Re-reading old favorites can be a deep, deep danger to us when we come back to books out of a sense of nostalgia. Yes, I’ve had this feeling myself, although no examples are leaping to mind just now. But then, I don’t do as much direct re-reading as some other readers do. Only once in a while do I really re-read a book in its entirety; more often, I just “dip into” old favorites to refresh my memory on passages I recall enjoying. But yes, I’ve had the “Oh my God, this beloved old classic is actually a steaming bowl of suck!” feeling.

Which brings me to this wonderful post by Jo Walton about how this comes to pass:

The Suck Fairy is an artefact of re-reading. If you read a book for the first time and it sucks, it’s nothing to do with her. It just sucks. Some books do. The Suck Fairy comes in when you come back to a book that you liked when you read it before, and on re-reading—well, it sucks. You can say that you have changed, you can hit your forehead dramatically and ask yourself how you could possibly have missed the suckiness the first time—or you can say that the Suck Fairy has been through while the book was sitting on the shelf and inserted the suck. The longer the book has been on the shelf unread, the more time she’s had to get into it. The advantage of this is exactly the same as the advantage of thinking of one’s once-beloved ex as having been eaten by a zombie, who is now shambling around using the name and body of the former person. It lets one keep one’s original love clear of the later betrayals.

Yup, I’ve met the Suck Fairy myself. She’s an irritating lass, I gotta say. But I generally tend to be lucky in not remembering things I loved through rose-colored glasses, if that makes sense; I’m usually pretty good at realizing that things that weren’t very good actually weren’t very good, so by the time I come back to them later in life, I don’t find that massive epiphany (“OMG, this is shite!”). In fact, I tend to err in the other way, which is how I watch movies like Krull or Battle Beyond the Stars now and end up thinking, “Huh…not as awful as I expected it to be.”

But then, maybe I’m just generically pessimistic.

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Racing for Watermelons!!!

The Amazing Race started up the other night. A few random thoughts:

:: I never know teams by name this early on. In fact, I won’t know teams by name until half of them are gone. So I end up referring to them by characteristics or by things that happened to them.

:: I like that the teams had to drive themselves to places. That was great. Most of th time over the last few seasons, teams are told to rely on taxis or the like. This really started to grate on me in the consecutive seasons (a regular one, and an “All-Star” one) that featured Dustin and Kandace, the annoying blonde friends, who would invariably get right where they needed to go by hopping off the airplane and then flirting like crazy until they found some wide-eyed guy compelled by his Little General to personally drive them where they needed to go.

:: But I think this year’s teams are stupid. A lot of ’em, anyway. Especially at the starting line: Phil has just told them they have to get to the airport fast, because only three teams will make the early flight to wherever it is they’re going. So, time is of the essence right off the bat. Then he yells “Go!”, and everyone’s off. They run to their bags, and then each team stops right there to read the first clue. Huh?! Phil’s just told you to move your asses, and you already know you’re going to the airport! Grab your stuff, get in a car, and start driving! Read the clue in the car! Seriously, if anyone had done that, they would have had a 60-second head start, guaranteed.

:: I thought I’d like the biker team, until one of them said, “Wow, until today I’d never heard of Stonehenge. And it’s a bunch of rocks!” Now I hate that team.

:: They may get annoying later on, but the one lady taking a watermelon right in the face from a misfired slingshot gets a ton of respect from me.

:: A new thing this year: an “Express Pass”, which allows a team to skip a Detour or Roadblock if they don’t want to do it. I wonder if this replaces the Fast Forward? And I wonder if they’re allowed to use it to negate the effects of a U-Turn?

Next week they’re in Ghana. From England to Ghana? They’re not messing around this time!

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The Beatles Song of the Week: “In My Life”

I’ve loved this song for years…many years. And I loved it years before I even knew that it was a Beatles song at all. The first time I remember hearing it was, of all places, at the end of an episode of Family Ties; Meredith Baxter-Birney sang it at the end of a clip show as her teevee family was gathered around. I heard it again a few years later, in a wonderful cover by Judy Collins, in an episode of The Wonder Years. I didn’t learn that “In My Life” was a Beatles song until four or five years after that. Wow.

In fact, for all the years I maintained that I just didn’t like The Beatles, it was “In My Life” that kept me from claiming that I hated them outright; I had to stick with the milder claim that I liked them as songwriters but not so much as performers.

As for the song itself, according to Wikipedia, the lyrics form a meditation on John Lennon’s childhood and were set to music by Paul McCartney. These lyrics are so poetic, managing to put so much meaning and emotion into just two stanzas! It’s really pretty amazing stuff.

There are places I’ll remember
All my life, though some have changed
Some forever, not for better
Some have gone and some remain
All this places have their moments
With lovers and friends I still can recall
Some are dead and some are living
In my life, I’ve loved them all

But of all these friends and lovers
There is no one compares with you
And these memories lose their meaning
When I think of love as something new
Though I know I’ll never lose affection
For people and things that went before
I know I’ll often stop and think about them
In my life, I love you more

Though I know I’ll never lose affection
For people and things that went before
I know I’ll often stop and think about them
In my life, I love you more
In my life– I love you more

There’s a lot going on here — memories of things that have gone before, elegies for things gone forever, regret for things that have changed, and an admission that the love of the present is so much more potent than the nostalgic feelings for things “that went before”. “In My Life” is a love song, and a memorial, all in one. I love this song dearly.

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Back to the ship of dreams….

Actress Gloria Stuart has died, at the age of 100. She is most famous for her portrayal of Rose Dawson, at the age of 101, in the “present day” scenes of Titanic. Not only was she the oldest actress ever nominated for an Oscar, but Titanic is the only film to ever have two actresses nominated for Oscars for playing the same character. I love this, from the obituary:

Ms. Stuart wrote a memoir, “I Just Kept Hoping” (1999), in which she said of her late-blooming career, “When I graduated from Santa Monica High in 1927, I was voted the girl most likely to succeed. I didn’t realize it would take so long.”

I never saw Stuart in anything else, but her performance in Titanic was just fantastic. She provided the film’s emotional grounding, in the way she tells the story that she’s never told anyone at all, until the moment happens to come that almost requires her to do so. Stuart is what keeps the film from becoming a lot of maudlin, melodramatic schlock. One of my favorite moments comes early on, when she is allowed to look at objects recovered from her very own stateroom, objects she recognizes and remembers but hasn’t seen since the great ship went down. She gazes at her hand mirror in wonder, and then looks into the glass, whereupon she sets it down, simply saying, “The reflection’s changed a bit.”

And now I want to watch Titanic again. I kind of want to watch it with The Daughter, but I just don’t think she’s old enough for it yet. A few more years….

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The Mystery Tool, explained!

The other day, I posted a photo of a tool I occasionally use at work and solicited guesses as to what the tool might be:

The Mystery Tool!

It’s not a home-made plumb bob; I already have an honest-to-goodness plumb bob in my tool bag. Aaron identified what the tool is, but not what it’s for. It is the magnet from a cabinet door catch, removed from its housing and tied to a length of fishing line. He suggested that I might use it to retrieve metallic objects from tight spots, and yes, I could use it thusly, but generally for that kind of operation I have a telescoping magnet that I use. Theoretically this doohickey could suffice to reach areas where my telescoping magnet isn’t long enough, but I’ve never been in that kind of fix before. No, this gadget is for something else.

Here’s how I use it: I pay out the line and then dangle the magnet at the end of about two feet of line. Then, holding the line up against a wall, I set the magnet to swinging back and forth, so its arc is parallel with the wall. And then I move the hand holding the fishing line around the wall while the magnet continues to swing. If it slows before I’m finished, I nudge it swinging again and keep moving the line around the wall. The idea is for the swinging magnet to track over as much of the wall’s space as possible…until it stops, having encountered ferrous metal just beneath the surface of the wallpaper. What could that metal be? Why, a standard-issue drywall screw, which is fastening the drywall to a stud.

So, our mystery tool is a low-tech stud-finder. And believe it or not, I’ve had better luck using this tool than I’ve had using an electronic stud-finder. Sometimes I install things on our walls at The Store that require some heavy-duty fastening, and if I can accomplish this by sinking a screw into our metal studs, that’s a lot better than using anchors that mar the walls. Therefore, occasionally I need to locate the studs, and this works beautifully (on regular old wallpapered walls, anyway — I haven’t tried this on the FRP-covered walls in our food prep areas yet). Cool, huh! So if you need a stud-finder for home use, give this trick a try. Magnetic cabinet latches only cost a few bucks, a lot less than the electronic stud-finders out there.

(No, I didn’t think of this myself. I read about the trick in a magazine some months ago. I can’t remember which magazine, though, but it was one of the “home improvement” mags I like to browse at the library.)

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Sentential Links #222

The march of linkage carries on….

:: My introduction to Wagner’s great four-opera masterpiece, The Ring of the Nibelung, was probably the same as many in my generation: through Star Wars.

:: I really don’t know what you do about the “taxes is theft” crowd, except possibly enter a gambling pool regarding just how long after their no-tax utopia comes true that their generally white, generally entitled, generally soft and pudgy asses are turned into thin strips of Objectivist Jerky by the sort of pitiless sociopath who is actually prepped and ready to live in the world that logically follows these people’s fondest desires. Sorry, guys. I know you all thought you were going to be one of those paying a nickel for your cigarettes in Galt Gulch. That’ll be a fine last thought for you as the starving remnants of the society of takers closes in with their flensing tools.

:: Also, there are, like, a thousand Madisons now. Thanks, Splash.

:: When I was 15, this ad summed up for me everything I thought was ultra-groovy. What girl didn’t want to look like this?

:: Who knows? Maybe F bombs are what it will take for some people to get it. Heh, heh, heh.

:: We hung up and I’ve been laughing and crying on and off ever since. Thinking about the passage of time, the joy and the sadness, and that I wish my stepfather was still here and could have seen that game.

:: Superman has a plan and that plan involves three animals. (Yeah, I want to know what the plan is, too!)

:: I then had a flashback to the worst of all grandparent desserts… Black Walnut Ice Milk! (Heh. We had a cat once, an orange Persian named Papagena — Poppie, for short. Poppie loved ice cream. Absolutely adored it. Whenever someone ate ice cream, she’d hover around until you gave her the bowl at the end. And if she was sleeping in a bedroom and you were eating ice cream in the living room, she would come running the second she heard the clinking of the spoon against the bottom of the bowl. And she knew the difference in sound between a spoon against the bowl of ice cream, because she wouldn’t budge if you tried to fake her out by clinking a spoon on the bottom of an empty bowl, or if you were eating soup or cereal. But…she loathed ice milk, and on the rare occasion that was the offering, once she discovered that it was ice milk in the bowl, she’d glower at us and stalk off.)

That’s all for this week. More next week!

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I wanna be a sportswriter

Jerry Sullivan of the Buffalo News, today:

We ought to be talking about Chan Gailey’s first win as the Bills’ head coach today. God knows what took him so long, but he figured out that Ryan Fitzpatrick gave his team a better chance to win than Trent Edwards. He was right.

Jerry Sullivan, five days ago:

But this move, pulling the rug out two weeks into the regular season, smacks of desperation. It makes Gailey look weak and wishy-washy, and leads me to wonder if he’s even remotely as sharp an offensive mind as we’ve been led to believe.

Sullivan is an odd case. When the Bills play poorly, he is negative to a relentless degree, and when he is on the radio shows the next day after a loss, he is often bitter and/or downright angry. After last week’s loss, he was so furious on the radio show the next morning (I listen to it on my way to work) that I almost felt Sullivan’s spittle coming through my speakers. This from a guy who constantly claims to be the dispassionate voice, the objective observer of Buffalo sports with no personal stake in the matter as a fan. He loves to talk about what “you fans” accept and what “you fans” do wrong in supporting these teams, but really — would someone who isn’t a fan get as angry as Sullivan does?

And it often leads him to contradictory positions. Through much of the offseason, Sullivan insisted over and over again that the Bills, as a franchise, need to “bottom out”. This means finally just becoming so bad as to lose enough games to end up picking in the top three of the draft, so they could conceivably grab a really good quarterback. (Although frankly, had they picked first this year, I’d have wanted them to take Suh, the defensive stud who went to Detroit.) “They need to bottom out! They need to be really bad before they can move forward! They need to bottom out! They need to suck before they can be good again!”

And yet, after last week’s game against the Packers, in which the Bills played as poorly as I’ve ever seen a Bills team play, Sullivan was on the radio the next morning, spouting his “I’m not a fan” rage over the airwaves. When one of the show’s co-hosts pointed out that Sullivan wanted them to “bottom out” and that they were doing exactly what he wanted them to do, Sully’s response was one of the lamest I’ve ever heard: “I want them to bottom out with the right people.”

And now, here he is: “Benching Trent Edwards is a horrible move that reeks of desperation! But it’s also the exact right decision!”

Yeah, I want to be a sportswriter. Because you never have to be consistent.

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New Pats, same as the Old Pats

Well, that was pretty much a predictable result for the Bills venturing onto the field against a team they’ve beaten once in the last twenty times (or something like that…I’m not digging too far into the history here). In fact, that’s pretty much the way it’s gone for the Bills each year versus New England: they play them fairly tough the first time they see them, and then get steamrolled the second time. Luckily, the Bills don’t see the Pats again until very late in the year. Second to last game, if I recall correctly.

But on a “big picture” kind of note, this was the kind of game I was hoping to see more of from the Bills this year. I figured they’d lose. A lot. Because they’re lacking in talent in a lot of areas. So I was hoping to at least see some impressive losses, losses in which we see flashes of good play from youngsters on the team; I wanted to see some hint that the team at least has some potential play-making talent to serve as the basis for a real rebuilding project, as opposed to the perennial “We think we can win with the guys we got” thinking that’s dominated the organization for most of this decade. And today, we saw a bit of that. Really good play from the secondary. Some real explosiveness from CJ Spiller. Blocking from the young offensive line (well, Cornell Green excepted, who is old and crappy) that wasn’t cover-your-eyes awful. Plays from young receivers. And, in general, a sense from the team that no matter what happens, they’re not going to just roll over and play dead. That’s exactly what they showed today, so even though they lost, I can’t be too upset about it. If the majority of their losses this year look like today’s, then I’ll go into the offseason thinking, maybe, they’ve finally got something of a foundation to work with.

But yes, it’s still a loss, so chalk up another pie in the face for Bills fans!

What it feels like to be a Bills fan these days

But on the bright side, at least this one was like getting hit with your favorite kind of pie. At least the flavor of the Bills’ latest splat upon the football field isn’t objectionable. (The first two games? Those were pies made of shaving cream. Ugh!)

A couple of random notes:

:: For all their losing to the Pats, the Bills have sacked Tom Brady more than any other team. That’s probably because now-retired Aaron Schobel sacked Brady more times than anybody else.

:: Steve Johnson seems to have taken his demotion from #2 receiver to #3 receiver pretty well, because he actually made some plays today.

:: Ryan Fitzpatrick’s first interception was awful, but on the second, it looked like the intended receiver (can’t remember who, will have to watch a highlight) wasn’t watching for the ball. If he had been, he could have made a play on it, or at least broken up the pick. It looked like the pick happened before the receiver even realized the ball was on its way.

:: Gilette Stadium really looks like a great place to watch a football game, doesn’t it? Even setting aside the enormous phallic symbol that stands just beyond one the open end zone. What’s that supposed to be, anyway?

:: For all the tongue-bathing the announcers gave Tom Brady, the Pats don’t look especially impressive to me, particularly on defense. They could have some headaches in store for them down the road.

:: Great moments in sportscasting: When Danny Woodhead scored a rushing TD, the color guy said, “Danny Woodhead — there’s a name you don’t hear about scoring much for the Patriots!” That’s because until a week ago, Danny Woodhead wasn’t even on the Patriots. This is like saying “Wow, Troy Aikman hasn’t thrown a touchdown for the NY Giants in forever!” Better announcers, please.

:: Great Scott, the Bills are bad at linebacker. What a train wreck they are at that position. I almost think that’s the most important thing they need to address next offseason (after drafting a quarterback, that is).

Next week, the Bills come home to host the Jets, another team they always seem to play tough and tight, no matter which team is supposed to be good and which is supposed to stink. Game on!

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Sunday Burst of Weird and AWESOME!

Oddities and Awesome abound!

:: Possibly not for the squeamish, but here are some stunning images of a python digesting a rat. Fascinating stuff!

:: A friend of mine tipped me off on this item — thanks, Scotty! — and boy howdy, do I ever want one. It’s just a standard pizza cutter…but it’s in the shape of the starship Enterprise.

:: This is a really cool baseball story. I had no idea that Bing Crosby was ever a part owner of the Pittsburgh Pirates, but it turns out that Crosby owned an archival film of the Pirates’ Game Seven win in the 1960 World Series, which is one of the most legendary of all World Series victory games. I wouldn’t mind seeing this!

More next week!

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Happy Birthday George!

Not George Lucas, but one of my other favorite Georges, with whom I share the birthday of September 26: George Gershwin. In his honor, here is the animation for Rhapsody in Blue, produced for the Disney film Fantasia 2000 (which seems to me a terribly underrated movie — there is some wonderful animation in that film). The opening narration here is dubbed into French, but once the music starts (at about the :50 mark), it doesn’t matter one whit. (It’s in two parts to account for YouTube’s duration limits.)

The style is inspired by the famous, oh-so-NYC caricatures of Al Hirschfeld (with, to my eye, a bit of the Eloise books as well).

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The official site of Kelly Sedinger: Reader, writer, photographer, and dreamer

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