Meg and Miles

Post corrected below.

Regarding a bit of recent reading:

:: Some years ago — I don’t recall how long — I read the first few volumes in Lois McMaster Bujold’s series of books on the adventures of a man named Miles Vorkosigan. I’m not sure that the series has an “official” name, so for my purposes, I’ll call it the Vorkosigan Chronicles. I’d been hearing about these books for years; it consists of a long series of self-contained novels about Miles Vorkosigan and the people around him, and every time a new book in the sequence would come out, I’d see a flurry of discussion in various forums online as fans of Bujold’s books devoured her latest offering.

This is one of those series where there tends to be a bit of diverging opinion as to the “best” order in which to read the books. One can read them in “story order”, meaning, reading the books in the order that the events within take place; or, one can read them in the order in which the books were published. In truth…I’m not sure which order I went with. Baen Books has reprinted the novels over the last few years in omnibus editions that gather two or three at a time, making it easy to read the books more-or-less in story order, or so I think. Anyway, I started with Cordelia’s Honor, which gathers two novels, Shards of Honor and Barrayar, which tell the story of how Miles’s parents come together and have their famous son. So I read a book consisting of two books, out of publication order.

You can see how this gets a bit confusing.

Anyway, this was the second time I had read Cordelia’s Honor. The first time, I liked the book just fine…but I wasn’t sure I understood the wild love that fans have for the series. I found it genial enough, but I wasn’t overwhelmed. I later read The Warrior’s Apprentice, the first actual book about Miles himself, as part of the omnibus Young Miles. That one, too, I enjoyed…but wasn’t overwhelmed.

So why did I decide to return to the Vorkosigan Chronicles? Well, even though I wasn’t wowed by it, I did like it, and always meant to get back to it. But I’d waited long enough that I figured I pretty much didn’t remember enough of it to keep going, so I figured I’d best start over at the beginning. Which meant going back to Cordelia’s Honor. And this time, I was wowed by the book.

I’m finding that this happens a lot for me when I return to books some years later, especially SF books that I either didn’t dislike but also didn’t find fantastic the first time around. I chalk this up to the fact that I’m a more experienced SF reader now than I was even five, six, seven years ago. I find it easier to pick up on certain SF tropes now than I used to, which makes it a lot easier to read some of these books.

But maybe this shouldn’t have mattered so much in the case of Cordelia’s Honor, as the book is very character-driven. At no point did I get a feeling that I was reading the unfolding of a plot, but rather following the actions of a group of characters, some of whom are deeply sympathetic and some of whom are…deeply not. As the book opens, Captain Cordelia Naismith is commanding a scientific expedition on some planet when her group is attacked by soldiers from the militaristic world of Barrayar. Left behind by her fleeing co-workers, she finds herself depending on the similarly-stranded Barrayaran officer Aral Vorkosigan for her survival. Cordelia is from Beta Colony, a rival world of Barrayar, and as the two work together to survive, they discover plots afoot…and increasingly complex feelings for one another.

I don’t want to give away much, since the story twists and turns in a lot of fascinating ways, but it’s no spoiler to note that eventually Cordelia gives birth to young Miles Vorkosigan, who will be the hero of all the books and stories in the series to come. Miles, though, is not without his own set of challenges; for reasons outlined in Barrayar, Miles is born with his growth stunted and with extremely brittle bones that are constantly breaking. In short, Miles is the last kind of son a man would wish to have in a heavily militaristic society. I look forward to reading how Miles overcomes these challenges in the books ahead; just from the two volumes presented in Cordelia’s Honor, I can tell that Bujold’s approach is to create engaging, sympathetic characters and then put them through hell.

:: Another book that I probably should have read long before this is Madeleine L’Engle’s A Wrinkle in Time, which was published in 1962 and won the Newbery Award. [CORRECTION: Until just today, I always thought that the famed award for Childrens’ Literature was spelled “Nerberry”. It’s actually “Newbery”. Thanks to the reader who pointed this out — that reader being none other than my retired librarian mother. Thanks, Mom!] I had no idea at all what to expect from this book, but even so, it defied the few expectations I had. I expected fantasy, but the book is much more strongly science fictional than fantastic in nature (even taking into account the forever-shifting dividing line between SF and fantasy). As with many books involving children as protagonists, the heroes are misfits — generally unpopular at school and not understood by anyone except for a couple of their peers. They are whisked away on an improbably adventure, this one to rescue their father, who has been missing for years and whom most believe to have basically run off, either with a mistress or for some other reason.

What makes A Wrinkle in Time compelling, in addition to well-done characters, is the ominous tone struck throughout the book, and the fact that it’s so overtly SF. Among books published today, I don’t see a whole lot of SF for kids, but there’s so much in Wrinkle that is SFnal that I end up wondering anew when it was that kids turned away from SF, or had SF turn away from them. Nowadays, it seems that the only real SF-type stuff kids ever see aimed at kids are a lot of Star Wars materials and superhero stories.

Anyway, I’m not sure how A Wrinkle in Time managed to elude me all these years, but I’m glad to have it off my “I should read that sometime” list. Now to track down the others in the sequence.

:: Way back when we were in college, The Girlfriend (now The Wife) bought a goofy book called 14000 Things to be Happy About. And that’s exactly what it is: a giant list of 14000 things you should be happy about.

Things to be happy about

Obviously you don’t just read this thing cover to cover. That way, madness lies. Instead, you dip, here and there, finding things you’re already happy about, or that you should be happy about, or things that you’d be happy about if you were certifiably insane.

Of course, I’d be silly to read anything into this, but it tickles me nonetheless to see two of my favorite things on the same page, out of 14000:

Two of my favorite things...on the same page!

Of course, I’m ambivalent about unbuttered green beans, and I’m not sure why I should find appeal in the rattling of garbage cans, but bib overalls and pie throwing? I’m there!

More book notes, as always, as I read more books….

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Something for Thursday

I see that filmmaker Blake Edwards died today. I didn’t see too many of his movies, but those that I did, I liked immensely. Here are two favorite clips from his movies.

First, the ever-amazing Audrey in Breakfast at Tiffany’s:

The way she looks up at the end and says “Hi!” just sends shivers a-tingling the length of my spinal column. Audrey Hepburn always seems so…weary in this film. It’s evident in her eyes that she’s seen so much, and that a great deal of what she’s seen has been sad or traumatic in some way. It always amazes me that she made this movie three years before she made my beloved My Fair Lady, in which her spirit is so youthful in her energy and her exuberance that she seems ready to bubble right off the screen.

And, of course, being right up my alley, there’s this little scene from Edwards’s zany road-trip comedy The Great Race. It’s just the greatest pie fight ever filmed. Huzzah!

Well, maybe it is. I’m not entirely sure what the criteria would be for judging pie fights, but this one’s got a lot going for it: duration, amount of edible ammunition, a scantily-clad beautiful woman sustaining multiple hits, and the lead actor almost managing to wander through the scene without getting hit himself. That adds up to a pretty good pie fight!

RIP Blake Edwards.

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An antidote to annoyance

As you all might expect, I am seriously irritated by my lack of Internet connection at home and the Keystone Kops manner in which EarthLink is going about fixing it. The latest? Out of curiosity I decided today just to see if maybe my phone was causing some kind of problem, so I experimented with plugging it in, unplugging it, et cetera, just to see if my DSL would come on. And what did I find out?

Since their “tech” came out, my landline has apparently been dead too! What the hell did they do, shut off my entire phone line instead of fixing it?

AGGHHHH!!!

So I’m annoyed and need something to amuse me. Which brings me to…some pie-throwing action.

Antigone Magazine is trying to raise money by selling calendars; in an effort to drum up business, the editor, a young woman named Amanda Reaume, has decided to take a pie in her face for every ten calendars they sell. They must be up to thirty, because so far, she’s received three:

Self-inflicted, too — that takes some moxie.

And then there are Ten Unexpected Pies in the Face:

And…ten more (with a Star Wars one)!

OK, that’s helping my mood. A bit, anyway. Harumph.

Stupid EarthLink.

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HE CAUGHT IT…oh. Crud.

Steelers 19, Bills 16 in OT. Sigh….

Well, once again, the Bills lose but they do it in such a way that leaves a weird sense of potential optimism for the team’s future. Usually when a team gets really bad and has to start rebuilding, they go through a progression of phases. First they’re the bad team that everybody wants to play, because they’re terrible and an easy win. (This year, the Carolina Panthers seem to be fitting that role.) But there’s a phase that sometimes gets overlooked, and that’s when you’re the bad team that nobody wants to play. That’s the Bills this year. Their record is awful and they’re still on pace for a pick in the top five of the draft, but damn, they work so hard and play so hard and they just don’t make it easy for anybody to beat them.

But they usually get beaten anyway. That’s because, right now, the Bills’ level of talent just does not match up to their level of heart. When it does, look out. But for now, it’s one painful loss after another.

The main goat today is apparently Stevie Johnson, the Bills’ certifiably “great story” of the year — the seventh-round pick who has blossomed in this, his third year, as he puts on fine receiving display after fine receiving display. But today, in overtime, he was wide open for a long pass, a 40-yarder, that Ryan Fitzpatrick put right in his hands as he entered the end zone. He catches that pass, the game ends right there, 22-16 Bills. Instead, Johnson drops the pass, and then just sits on the ground, in stunned disbelief. It was a clutch situation, and he dropped the ball.

Now, Johnson still has a ton of talent, he’s still having a great year, and he’s still a young player who can learn a valuable lesson here about what it means to be really clutch. And I hope all that happens, because you can’t be considered a great receiver if you drop that pass. (For my money, the worse gaffe was Leodis McKelvin’s fumbled punt return in OT. The Bills recovered the ball, but they lost about twenty yards on the fumble. Those yards might have been the difference between the drive ending in another punt and the drive ending in a field goal attempt. Oh well.

Anyway, the Bills came close to knocking off one of the NFL’s best teams. But instead, once again, it’s Pie Time for Bills fans!

What it feels like to be a Bills fan these days

Lots of pie for me this weekend, eh?

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Runaway trains! Antiques! Food! Pies! What a weekend!

(UPDATED below.)

I spent a muchly-deserved, muchly-anticipated long weekend over the Thanksgiving holiday. It was a great time. Details and photos and such after the break. This is a “daily life” type of post, with a bunch of photos. But there’s also a punchline at the end which you may find amusing, if you’ve ever thought I warranted some kind of “just desserts”….

Lazy Thanksgiving Morning

Thanksgiving Morning here at Casa Jaquandor is a lazy affair. The Wife and I are often quite tired heading into this particular weekend, as our jobs both tend to pick up and become very hectic as the Holiday Season approaches. We’re always grateful to have a morning that consists of lazing about, watching the Macy’s Parade, drinking coffee, and eating donuts. It’s especially relaxing because…we don’t cook T-giving dinner.

For the last five or six years, our tradition on Thanksgiving has been to eat out. With my parents not really feeling like cooking the massive meal anymore, and with their drive to our home being about an hour, we’ve decided it’s best just to go to a local restaurant. We tried a couple of different places early on, and were disappointed, but then The Wife and I discovered Danny’s a few years back. We first went there on an October night several years ago, whereupon we discovered that they were open for Thanksgiving with special meals, including a turkey dinner. We loved their set-up, and we had a winner. So that’s where we go. This year, they did away with the “special Thanksgiving menu” and instead set up a buffet line, with all the usual Thanksgiving selections. (Almost all, actually — The Wife didn’t get her beloved green bean casserole.)

After the mid-afternoon meal (when we sat down, the Lions led the Patriots 17-10, but when we left, the Patriots had won 45-24), my parents absconded with The Daughter for a couple of days at their home, allowing The Wife and I some quality time together. This was extremely welcome! The Wife and I have, in the past, found it entirely too easy to lose sight of making time for one another — especially since for years we’ve worked opposite shifts at our respective jobs — so now, we tend to aggressively plan our time together and make the most of it when it comes. And we crammed a lot into the 48 hours we had together!

After T-giving dinner, it’s become our own little tradition to go to a movie. This year we selected Unstoppable, the runaway-train movie with Denzel Washington and Chris Pine. But since the show-time was still ninety minutes away, we were able to run home and change into more comfortable clothes.

Ooooog, I ate too much....

Among the many virtues of bib overalls is that of all pants, they are by far the most comfortable to wear in the hours following an enormous meal.

So we went to see Unstoppable, which we loved. I’ll have a full review of the movie up sometime soon, but I do want to note that the Regal Cinemas in the new addition at the Walden Galleria Mall is a great place to see a movie. They’ve somehow made the concept of stadium seating even better, with seats that rock a bit and armrests/cupholders that swing up and out of the way, which makes for easier hand-holding with one’s sweetie during a movie. Yay! (We tend to like the action pictures on T-giving Day. Not sure why.)

The next morning, of course, was Black Friday. We’re not the types who go out at four in the morning to find the best deals on stuff; we do go out shopping a bit, but later on, after more morning relaxing and coffee.

Coffee on Black Friday

Later on we ventured out to do some shopping. JCPenney (clothes for the kid), Barnes&Noble (book ideas for the kid — but none purchased), JoAnn Fabrics (sewing supplies for some of The Wife’s projects), Home Depot (bought a Dremel 4000 rotary tool, huzzah!), and a few other stops. We had lunch at Panera Bread, where I looked kind of bored:

Waiting for lunch

We also planned to make a nice dinner that night of steak, and squash, so it was off to a grocery store to pick up those items among a few others, including…three coconut cream pies.

Nobody doesn't like Sara Lee!!!

More on the pies later….

But amidst all of this, we were also having some frustration with a local tire dealer. Our minivan needed new tires, and to make a long story short, The Wife got a quote for new tires several weeks ago, and then, in the intervening period, the tire place changed managers. This new guy proceeded to muck things up to the point that next time we’ll just go someplace else. (For the locals: it wasn’t Dunn Tire. Not going there in the first place was probably our first mistake.) This manager guy started off by telling us he would honor the quoted price, then said that he could only honor the quoted price if we got the same identical tires as last time (which weren’t in stock), then told us he couldn’t honor that quoted price unless we could prove, with receipts, that we’d had the previous tires properly rotated every…however long it is you’re supposed to allow to transpire between tire rotations.

Anyway, The Wife got more and more angry until the guy finally got all apologetic and offered a $100 discount for the “miscommunication”, but we’re still unhappy and do not plan to go back. I love it when management people blatantly screw up and try to blame it on a “miscommunication”. Ugh!

During all of this, lake-effect snows started to move into the region, for the first real snowfall of the winter.

Visibility, oh noes!

To give an idea of how quickly the snow bands can move at times, this intersection — about 2 miles from Casa Jaquandor, the corners of Southwestern Blvd. and Milestrip Rd. — looked like this ten minutes after I had driven through it the first time. That’s what can happen in Buffalo, folks! It’s been a very mild winter thus far — the one day before this that we “had snow”, a couple weeks ago, it was an overnight dusting that had already melted by the time we got up.

Now, however, the “blustery” has arrived.

Blustery!

Our other main shopping destination that day was the Orchard Park Antique Mall, which is a big store that is full of antiques, offered by different dealers. We spent close to two hours there, that’s how big and fascinating a place it is — you can find everything there from beautiful antique jewelry to vintage action figures to old books to old furniture. Just an amazing place.

Antiquing: Man in the mirror

Antiquing: My back in the mirror

And in any antique store, you can find lots of questionable stuff as well. At one point we saw a set of glow-in-the-dark plastic figurines from the Casper the Friendly Ghost movie that came out in the 1990s. The Wife and I recoiled in horror, because these figurines were a tie-in item when we worked at Pizza Hut. Aieee!

And then there are things which are well-nigh inexplicable:

Antiquing: Ewwwww!

I do not want to know.

After that — about five o’clock — we went to pick up the completed minivan and returned home for our steak dinner. Later on we drank some wine, we watched The Man with the Golden Gun…and we attended to the matter of those three coconut cream pies.

Sara Lee Tropical Coconut Cream Pie

Obviously we couldn’t eat three entire coconut cream pies — not just the two of us, at any rate. So, to what use did we put them? Where did those pies end up?

Well…here’s where they ended up:

Splat! The Aftermath

Yup. All three, in my face.

What can I say? I’m a sucker for a pie in the face. This is a fate that befalls me every once in a while, and as my good friend Belladonna once said, “It’s a bit of a rediculous tradition I suppose, but it has been fun and keeps me from taking myself too seriously!”

The holidays can be a deeply emotional, and for some folks, troublesome time of year. I find that getting hit in the face with a pie is a good antidote to that. Yes, I believe in “pie in the face therapy”. Hey, it can’t be any less effective than some other “therapies” out there!

Here’s how it went down:

I hope your Black Friday was as much fun as ours (new tires notwithstanding)!

Splat!: Lookin' old-timey

Splat! Enjoying pie in my face.

UPDATE: No, this wasn’t the first time I’ve been pied. My last pieing can be found here. (Ignore the date on that post — I backdated it to keep it hidden as a kind of “easter egg” for people who went digging around for it. Now, I figure, why hide it?)

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The Edible Missile

I saw via Lance Mannion that for reasons passing understanding — and I mean, really passing my understanding — some kind of controversy erupted in Left Blogistan over, of all things, an ad for some kind of upcoming show based on Gilligan’s Island that TBS aired involving, again of all things, a pie fight. (You can see the ad here.) The Daily Kos sported an ad on his blog for the show, as part of his blogads or Google Ads or something similar, and some other people found the ad demeaning, and apparently it all went downhill from there, continuing today.

Now, I’m not that interested in the whole thing surrounding the ad; what interests me is how crappy the ad itself is. I can sort-of see what they’re getting at: they wanted a Ginger versus Mary Ann catfight, since catfights are held to be sexy or something, so they parody a somewhat memorable ad for Miller Lite from a few years back, in which two buxom young women escalate a fight over the classic Miller Lite debate (“Tastes great!” “Less filling!”) into fisticuffs, then water, then a full-out mudfight. The Gilligan ad up now does the same thing, substituting Ginger and Mary Ann for the two women from the Miller Lite ad, and coconut cream pies for the Miller Lite itself. (Coconut cream pies often figured in the slapstick comedy of Gilligan’s Island.) A few pies are exchanged in each others’ faces, and then they’re rolling on a table full of them. No, it’s not particularly sexy or erotic. Coulda been, but isn’t. (Believe me. I’m a believer in the erotic possibilities of such scenarios, and a firm believer that Cool-Whip isn’t just for iced coffee drinks and ice cream sundaes, if you take my meaning. But a pie in the face is, to me, a goofy scenario, not an erotic one, and rolling around on a table of them is of no greater erotic quality than doing the same in a vat of jello, mud, or Cheeze-wiz.)

The problem, as far as the ad goes, isn’t that it’s sexist or demeaning; I’m not sure it’s either of those things, because it’s not thoughtful enough to rise even to that level. The problem is that the Gilligan ad completely ignores the actual concept of that original Miller Lite ad. It wasn’t a beer commercial featuring a catfight, because if you remember that ad, you recall that after the buxom women have been inexplicably fighting for a few minutes, the scene cuts to a bar where two guys are staring dreamily into space while two intelligent women standing beside them look at them like they’re idiots, and one of them says something like, “That is your perfect beer commercial? You guys are idiots!” The Miller Lite ad was using stereotypes to make fun of men, not women; but the Gilligan ad completely omits this punchline, so all we’re left with is a pie fight that happens for no reason under the assumption that it’s sexy or something. Ho hum. To have something erotic happening, you have to have a story behind it, something emotional. There’s no such happening in the Gilligan ad. Nor was there in the Miller Lite ad; but then, there wasn’t supposed to be.

I’m not sure if I have a point here; I just wanted to elucidate why I think the Gilligan ad stinks. And that’s despite my own love of a pie in the face.

(By the way, I’ve been saving this for a Sunday Burst of Weirdness, but I guess it’s relevant here, in a “kinda sorta” way. I suspect that no matter what topic you can come up with, someone out there will have a ranked list for it. Case in point.)

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What’s a pie in the face among friends?

UPDATE: As of 2-23-13, I’ve relocated and updated all of the content from this post to a new page on this blog, ‘A pie in the face is a wonderful thing’. Thanks!

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