Tank You Very Much

Is it ever OK for sports teams to lose on purpose?

I’m sure we’d all say, “Probably not”. After all, there’s a very real reason that gambling is strictly forbidden in baseball, and there’s a very real reason one of the game’s greatest players — Shoeless Joe Jackson — will likely never get in the Hall of Fame. It has to do with losing on purpose.

But is it OK for a team to be purposely assembled by management with the goal in mind of being bad?

Well…if you’re in Buffalo, the answer is almost certainly a resounding “YES!!!”

Our NHL team in these parts, the Sabres, is virtually beloved. It’s entirely possible that hockey fandom is a bigger thing here than football fandom, although I suspect that’s because the Sabres had a brief period of being awesome eight or nine years ago while the Bills have been crappy for fifteen. But right now, the Sabres are awful. With one more loss, they will clinch the worst record in the NHL this season, and most fans here are fine with that.

Why?

Because the NHL Draft has not one but two astonishing prospects lined up to very likely go first and second in the first round. If the Sabres finish dead last, one of those two kids will end up playing in Buffalo. These guys (Connor McDavid and Jack Eichel) are referred to almost universally as “generational” players, the kinds of players who only tend to come along once every ten years or so. We’re talking Sidney Crosby and Mario Lemieux territory here.

But why would the Sabres be interested in both of those guys if they finish dead last? Well, that’s because the NHL does not do what the NFL and Major League Baseball do with their drafts. Those leagues slot their drafts strictly according to order of finish: the top pick goes to the team with the worst record, second pick to the second-worst, and so on, using various tie-breaker formulas to distinguish between teams with identical records. The NHL, instead, uses a lottery to determine the top pick, so this year (the lottery rules change next year, for some reason), the team that finishes dead last has only a 20 percent chance of picking first, that team is guaranteed to pick second if they don’t get the top pick. Which means that the team finishing dead last is guaranteed one of these two amazing players, who are both the type of talent that hasn’t resided in Buffalo in many moons, or maybe ever.

And the Sabres this year are bad. Really bad. Cataclysmically bad. Some sports people have determined that the Sabres are, statistically-speaking, historically bad. Ouch.

And they’re this bad, this year, on purpose.

Is that wrong? Is it wrong for a sports team’s management to purposely field an awful team?

Well, here’s the thing: I don’t think it is.

First of all, there’s nothing new at all about this. In hockey terms, they call it “tanking”, but a football team would likely refer to the phenomenon as “bottoming out”; you see it fairly often, when football teams whose rosters are aging and getting prohibitively expensive have a big purge of talent, resulting in a pretty bad team that has decided to go into “rebuilding mode”. Rebuilding almost always involves being pretty bad for at least a year or two (or so the team hopes; NFL history is replete with rebuilding projects that failed, resulting in another rebuild three or four years after the first one). “Bottoming out” is a pretty common idea in the NFL, and in fact, in recent years a lot of local sports commentators have called for the Bills to “bottom out”, so they might pick higher in the draft and maybe land on the best quarterbacks.

Meanwhile, the Sabres are definitely rebuilding. They have jettisoned virtually every high-priced player and every player who was due to become an unrestricted free agent, often in return for draft picks. This, too, is nothing new; baseball teams have been doing this for years. Over there it’s commonly called “having a fire sale”, when baseball teams that are pretty much out of contention start trading away players who are either going to be free agents or who command a high enough price in return that a team can use a trade to restock its minor league system with prospects. Are such teams “embracing losing”, as some have accused the Sabres of doing? I find it hard to see how. Same with the football teams who have elected to enter a rebuilding process. Is it “embracing losing” to enter into a period where losing is almost certain?

And why is it that sports commentators — columnists for the Buffalo News are notorious for this — so often call for rebuilds, call for “blowing it up and starting over”, call for “bottoming out”, only to harshly criticize the team when the process of rebuilding, blowing it up and starting over, or bottoming out results in a period of losing?

Who knows, but it seems to me that there are conflicting impulses at work here. We expect the players on the ice, or the field, or the diamond, to always put out their best effort. But the problem is that sometimes the best effort of management actually involves being bad for a while. The players may expect to win each time, but management has a different job, and sometimes it means being bad for an entire year in hopes of landing a very, very good player on the other end of it.

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Something for Thursday (Geoffrey Lewis edition)

I see that actor Geoffrey Lewis has died. He was a very common character actor when I was a kid, and I saw him in a lot of stuff, most memorably his turn as Orville, best friend of Clint Eastwood’s Philo Beddoe in Every Which Way But Loose and Any Which Way You Can. I know, they’re “bad” movies, but while you can often return to things you loved as a kid and see their faults laid bare, not so for me with these two movies, as ridiculous as they are. (And boy howdy, are they.) But those aren’t the only movies in which Lewis turned up; as I noted, he was in a lot of stuff. One memorable turn was as the town sheriff in the Mel Gibson teacher movie The Man Without A Face. In that film, it would have been easy to have the sheriff be wholly on the side of the townsfolk who eventually turn on the reclusive, disfigured teacher with a questionable past, and there are times when he definitely leans that way, but Lewis plays the sheriff as a man who seems to wearily know what’s really happening but is simply unable (or not entirely willing) to stop it, or at least try to stand in its way.

Lewis was also active in an odd storytelling-music group called Celestial Navigations. I’m sure I’ve featured this here before, but it’s really a fun bit of spoken-word art, and other Celestial Navigations performances with Geoffrey Lewis are well-worth tracking down.


I ain’t makin’ a move, I ain’t sayin’ a word — until somebody pays me!

Thanks for all the great work, Geoffrey Lewis!

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A Progress Report

(crossposted from ForgottenStars.net)

So, how are things going? Well, when I’m actively producing a first draft, I track my daily output in a spreadsheet. Here’s a photo of that spreadsheet, from the beginning of March:

Day 4: Fresh! Lots of fresh words going into Book III of late! #AmWriting #takentodaymarch15

Note that I started March with 106,522 words in the book.

As of tonight, here’s where we stand:

Off to a torrid start this month! #AmWriting

So in 36 days I’ve written a little under 45,000 words. Cool!

What does that mean, though , in terms of the book itself? Well, my goal on the first two books in The Song of Forgotten Stars was a first draft of 180K words. Stardancer came in a little under that (but not much), and Princesses II: Electric Boogaloo (not the actual title) came in a little over it (but not much). I am currently expecting Princesses III: Flight of the Bumblebee (not the actual title) to come in over the 180K target by more than Princesses II, but still not by a huge amount. Maybe around 190K. There’s a lot that happens in the final act, and in general, this book is turning out to be the most structurally complex of the series thus far.

Obviously I don’t want to say too much, but seeing the evolution of this book as it’s crystallized in my mind has been really interesting. I’m doing some things differently this time, in terms of narrative structure, that I didn’t do in the first two, and this one has a totally different flavor, as well. I like that each of these books goes to different places, does different things, and focuses on other characters and relationships. I wish I could say more, but you’ll all see what I’m talking about, in November 2016 when Book III comes out!

(But this is funny: when I started the book, I actually knew what the last scene was. Each one of these books ends with something like a Marvel superhero movie post-credits thing that sets up something in the next book, and I knew what this book’s ending cliffhanger was going to be, so I wrote it first, before even starting with Chapter One.

And now, things that have come to me since I started Chapter One have made it necessary for me to rewrite that cliffhanger scene! I love when my own writing surprises me.)

More updates to come! I’ll certainly announce when I’m done with this draft, because when I am, it’s time to start getting Princesses II ready for its November 2015 debut.

So, onward and upward! Zap! Pow!!

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Progress Report

So, how are things going? Well, when I’m actively producing a first draft, I track my daily output in a spreadsheet. Here’s a photo of that spreadsheet, from the beginning of March:

Day 4: Fresh! Lots of fresh words going into Book III of late! #AmWriting #takentodaymarch15

Note that I started March with 106,522 words in the book.

As of tonight, here’s where we stand:

Off to a torrid start this month! #AmWriting

So in 36 days I’ve written a little under 45,000 words. Cool!

What does that mean, though , in terms of the book itself? Well, my goal on the first two books in The Song of Forgotten Stars was a first draft of 180K words. Stardancer came in a little under that (but not much), and Princesses II: Electric Boogaloo (not the actual title) came in a little over it (but not much). I am currently expecting Princesses III: Flight of the Bumblebee (not the actual title) to come in over the 180K target by more than Princesses II, but still not by a huge amount. Maybe around 190K. There’s a lot that happens in the final act, and in general, this book is turning out to be the most structurally complex of the series thus far.

Obviously I don’t want to say too much, but seeing the evolution of this book as it’s crystallized in my mind has been really interesting. I’m doing some things differently this time, in terms of narrative structure, that I didn’t do in the first two, and this one has a totally different flavor, as well. I like that each of these books goes to different places, does different things, and focuses on other characters and relationships. I wish I could say more, but you’ll all see what I’m talking about, in November 2016 when Book III comes out!

(But this is funny: when I started the book, I actually knew what the last scene was. Each one of these books ends with something like a Marvel superhero movie post-credits thing that sets up something in the next book, and I knew what this book’s ending cliffhanger was going to be, so I wrote it first, before even starting with Chapter One.

And now, things that have come to me since I started Chapter One have made it necessary for me to rewrite that cliffhanger scene! I love when my own writing surprises me.)

More updates to come! I’ll certainly announce when I’m done with this draft, because when I am, it’s time to start getting Princesses II ready for its November 2015 debut.

So, onward and upward! Zap! Pow!!

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Answers, the Second!

OK, what the heck happened? Well, here’s what: I kicked off Ask Me Anything at the worst possible time: when I was entering the toughest part of writing a novel. See, as a proud member of Team Pants when it comes to writing, the second act in any book is usually where I have the most problems. I spend a lot of sessions wondering where any of this is going, and how I’m going to make it all work, and just what it is I’m setting up. Act II is supposed to set up Act III, but if I don’t know what’s going to happen in Act III, Act II can be really difficult. So I spend an enormous amount of mental energy writing the book, and a lot less on things like blogging.

And then, sometimes, real life intrudes: days when I have to be at work extremely early, which sap even more mental energy; school concerts and training classes for the dee-oh-gee; and lately, a very busy and draining couple of weeks at work. In the great game of rock-paper-scissors that is life, “Novel” beats out “Blog post” every time. The lesson here is simple: in the future, if I’m hip-deep in a complex novel in February, I’ll probably not do Ask Me Anything! then. We’ll see.

So that’s what’s going on, and that’s why so many questions have just gone unanswered, until now. Obviously I make no promises as to how things will go, but I’ve got this opportunity, so here we go, starting with Andy, who has a question about guitar solos.

WOO HOO!!! So while pondering important stuff while acting like I am working, I want your option on something. Now I have ALWAYS a thought the guitar solo that Eddie Van Halen does in the live version in 5150 was the best ever but now as I get a little bit older, I think the one in Hotel California is pretty darn good and don’t forget David Gilmore’s in ‘Comfortably Numb’ is awesome too. What say you OBI Won??

For reference, here are the three songs he cites:


I had never actually heard the live version of “5150” until now, so that’s really cool. My stock answer to the question “Van Halen or Van Hagar?” has always been some variant of “I like both equally”, but if I’m being very honest, the simple fact is this: if I get in the mood to listen to some Van Halen, I will usually end up listening to something from the Sammy era before I listen to something from the DLR era. That’s just the way it is, and I’m not going to debate it. I just love so many of the songs from the Sammy era, and the DLR era was just fantastic. We’re talking about, oh, “Do you like burgers or pizza more?” territory here. Plus, there’s some sentiment involved: when Teenage Me was just discovering rock music (before that, I was all about movie music and classical), Sammy Hagar was just joining Van Halen. That first album, 5150, blew my mind, and I still love it dearly to this day. The song “5150” is an underrated gem, in my opinion; it wasn’t one of the album’s singles, but that album simply does not have a weak song on it.

But anyway, I’d never heard Eddie Van Halen’s live solo until now, so that’s cool. And it’s quite the solo, going off in many different directions, not all of which are entirely related to the song itself. That’s not a problem, really – live solos are usually more elaborate and go farther afield than their album versions.

As for “Hotel California”, that’s pretty classic in itself, isn’t it? That song is so iconic it’s become almost a cliché, which is kind of sad, because it really is a very good song in itself with some terrific guitar work. And then there’s “Comfortably Numb”, that deeply odd song from a typically deeply odd Pink Floyd album. The solos in the song are deservedly revered, although I have heard some grumblings in the past that they’re not quite the technical masterpieces they sound like since they were (allegedly) cobbled together for the album out of different takes. I have no idea of the truth of that, but I do remember reading a blog post years ago by someone (geez, this sounds bad, doesn’t it) whose son was teaching himself guitar solos. Apparently he scoffed at the “Comfortably Numb” solo, which doesn’t sound all that technically difficult. And no, it doesn’t; that solo isn’t full of Van Halenesque guitar pyrotechnics. It’s all about the sound: you have to really know how to make that guitar sing, if you’re going to play that solo in any way convincingly. It’s demanding in a completely different way than “5150” or even “Hotel California”.

So what is the “greatest guitar solo of all time”? Well, who knows? Any of these could qualify, surely. And many others. Who can forget “Freebird”?


Along the “singing guitar” line, there’s this terribly underheard ballad from ZZ Top, “Rough Boy”.


And frankly, this deserves mention. Listen to what Prince does here when he steps up, halfway through a live all-star performance of The Beatles’ “While My Guitar Gently Weeps”.


So, readers, what guitar solos do you admire? Don’t limit yourselves to rock, either! There’s some great guitar work in blues and country and folk, and even classical!

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An A-to-Z Thing

I saw this at Ken Levine’s blog, so I thought I’d do it quickly.

And by the way, I told a bunch of people that I’d be doing some much-belated Ask Me Anything answers last week, but that was before last week turned into the Bataan Death March combined with the final flight of the Hindenberg, so…hopefully this week. In the future, by the way, I’ll eschew Ask Me Anything! if it coincides with me trying to get through the meaty part of a book. I don’t want to leave people dangling quite the way I have, both this year and last (when February saw us starting preparations for moving).

And now, the A-Z thing.

• A-Available/Single? “Hey dear? Am I single and available? I’m sorry, what? But it’s not my turn to do the dishes and clean the litterboxes! OK, fine….”

• B-Best Friend? Aside from The Wife? Probably this one dude who is one of my beta-readers and is the source of whatever insight I have on the game of hockey.

• C-Cake or Pie? Pie. But then, I’ve never been hit in the face with a cake, so maybe I’m missing something amazing.

• D-Drink Of Choice? Rum. Or Scotch. Or bourbon. Or beer. I also like water.

• E-Essential Item You Use Everyday? My phone, tablet, and laptop. Love the electronics. They make my life better!

• F-Favorite Color? Purple! But I honestly don’t dislike any colors.

• G-Gummy Bears Or Worms? Ewwww. I don’t like Gummi stuff.

• H-Hometown? Orchard Park, NY.

• I-Indulgence? There are these white-chocolate and toffee chip cookies at The Store that make me weep.

• January Or February? February. The Wife’s birthday, the Super Bowl, and spring training starts.

• K-Kids & Their Names? The Kid. Singular.

• L-Life Is Incomplete Without? Love.

• M-Marriage Date? May 17.

• N-Number Of Siblings? 1

• O-Oranges Or Apples? Apples. I enjoy oranges, but apples are so versatile and amazing!

• P-Phobias/Fears? Clowns tend to freak me out. Dogs, too. I like our dog, but I remain deeply suspicious of other dogs.

• Q-Favorite Quote? “I love you!” “I know.”

• R-Reason to Smile? Overalls and coffee for a Saturday morning writing session.

• S-Season? Fall.

• T-Tag Three or Four People? OK, you’re all it.

• U-Unknown Fact About Me? I cannot roll my R’s.

• V-Vegetable you don’t like? Broccoli. That shit can go extinct, for all I care.

• W-Worst Habit? Swearing a lot, eating too many sweets.

• X-X-rays You’ve Had? My collarbone, when some shitty kid pushed me off my bike years ago and broke it.

• Y-Your Favorite Food? Pizza. Or burgers. Or ice cream. Or jambalaya. Or spanish rice. Or fried fish. Or….

• Z-Zodiac Sign? Libra.

Nothing terribly interesting there, I guess!

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The official site of Kelly Sedinger: Reader, writer, photographer, and dreamer

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