I’ve long suspected curling of not being a real thing, and now Cal goes and confirms it, with this bit of “commentary” on Facebook (in response to this photo of what we’re told is the outcome of a curling match, but we know better, don’t we):
AN EIGHT ENDER???
I always ask the same questions when I see one of these pictures.
How the hell did the other team miss your rocks EIGHT FUCKING TIMES because they ALSO get eight rocks to throw. You got all your eight rocks to count but they did nothing to prevent that from happening. It’s like humans playing against squirrels when a eight ender occurs. They never show the other team who allowed EIGHT FUCKING POINTS to get scored against them because the shame is so great that their images will not even register on film.
An eight ender? This is about the worst real thing I can imagine happening. Four people with two rocks each on the other team couldn’t prevent this insult from occurring. How do you numnuts miss EVERYTHING in the house? Are you infirmed? Did none of your rocks even cross the hog line? I have to know. I HAVE TO KNOW!!
Yeah, there’s no way that’s a real sport! We’re on to you, Canada!